Tag Archives: Throbbing Ninja

15th May – CH4 – Throbbing Ninja

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A Throbbing Ninja run by the familiar trails near HTT. So familiar that Turkish Delight was out for a training run, saw us and came and joined in the fun, wondering what the hell we were doing there! He was on good form too, sprinting off at the start, and staying up with the FRBs throughout – the training must be paying off!

Memories of the last TN run cause nervous tension with the mountain looming – would she do it again? We set off and having been told it was about 4.5km, the mountain seemed the obvious direction. The usual place for a circle check. Right towards the lake, left along the bottom of the hills, or straight up the side of the waterfall? My gut said we were going to be going straight up, and for once I was right. I have bad memories of setting a truly terrible run up that trail in the past – I’d scouted the hell out of the area, and it didn’t end well – what would happen today?

Another couple of checks, and it was straight on up, up, up. Chuckie like a mountain goat crept up behind me, closer and closer, until when the trail took an abrupt turn to the left across the waterfall, he took over the charge. It wasn’t easy going, precariously balanced on the side of the hill with no real trail, just scrambling from paper to paper. Finally a trail, and the hares teased us by letting us use it for about 100m, before again cutting off into the unknown.

Finally we started descending, and Piggy, Turkey and Chuckie were with me as we charged down a nice trail. When we did get to a check, they didn’t think twice about following each other straight down, leaving me to do the dummy check back up the hill. Sure enough they were on, and the trail descended straight down to the main trail at the bottom of the hill. No check? Huh? Straight along the bottom back to the first circle, with the only confusion coming when we expected there to be checks and there weren’t. OnIn, and back home… It could have been worse!

After the circle was a visit to Coffee Monster, nice new restaurant / working place off the canal road.

1st May – CH4 – HRA

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The new CH4 runday, the new CH4 runtime – who would show up? how many? I arrived early, missing the traffic from work, and past Frozen Dick & Microwave getting some extra exercise on the way to the run – on their bikes. Microwave set off for a bit of a recce to find some trail. Turned out around 30 or so hashers showed up, one of the larger CH4 turn outs for a while. It was nice to see Ninja, Taste my Buns, Beautiful Box join us, and I’m sure there were some guys too – oh yeah, Sups was there. Not a bad start!

Eventually HRA let us have a hare brief and set us off. So called virgin trails – ha! Anyway, we set off and Chuckie and I walked for a while before starting a jog and eventually getting to the first check together. One of us should check left, buuuut… nah… Unlikely! So we carried on and found trail. I’ve never been to the left there, but nor has there ever been a hash set to the left there – I figure it’s a dead end! The next check we had to split up, and I opted for the regular route to the left. Somehow it was None of Your Business that found the 3rd choice and called us on. He led the way for a while as we headed into the hills. I enjoyed following Knock Out, Ninja and Itchy up the hill, and as we got to the top I caught up at a sneaky False Trail that was omitted from the hare brief.

We followed old trails up a ridgeline, and another circle check was surely going to take the trail up the the buddha statue on the hill… Nope? Seriously? He wanted to take us down to the gully? Damn! A circle check at the bottom of the hill, had me guessing it was to the left. I followed Itchy for a few paces before LumberJackOff called from the other direction. Where was it going? Turns out he was calling on old paper. Sure enough we were back up the hill, back to the trail by the little buddha statue – I could have saved myself the down and up if I’d just gone with my original theory. What the hell, we descended quickly to another familiar runsite.

Chuckie went further to the right – further away from home, while I mossied around a couple of trails, only to find Pigshit looking at some paper! He’d been absent all trail and then showed up ahead – had he spent some time at Graven’s private hashing school??? We charged down the hill to the Wimp Rambo split – a glance at the watch and it was already nearly 45 minutes – did we need the rambo option? Ugh, being first there, I guess I should do it…

Next circle check and I am a complete fucking moron. I should know the area better than that, but found myself checking out on a peninsula, while Graven’s favourite padawan called “RU?” from the other side of the lake, mockingly, like a blind man who really hadn’t seen the trail he was following! 😉 Back on trail, and back with the pack, somehow Taste my Buns was up front – nice running! We climbed through a barbed wire fence, while Horny took the arduous route over a tall gate. Down the road – we were homing in on the A. Taste my Buns was leading the way, and bizarrely she went right at another circle check – that wasn’t going anywhere. Chuckie alongside, and only Lumber Jack Off lumbering ahead, I made my move… We were nearly home, everything was falling into place, one more check, turn left and we are back in…. Except it wasn’t left, it was straight on… and coming back from 150m or so I was back behind None Of Your Business! He looked over his shoulder, saw me, started running, looked at his watch, figured it was too far, and the lazy boy gave up.

We had an extra loop around, but it was all kicked out as I came through, having the luxury of watching Chuckie and Horny congratulate each other as they found the final check and hence the OnIn.

Rain for the circle temporarily moved us up the hill to shelter, and then back to the the original site for a delayed, but entertaining circle.

19th May – CH4 – Chuck Wao

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Chuckie is meticulous about the planning and execution of his runs and stepped in for Throbbing Ninja at the familiar fire prevention centre. With a group of virgins and visitors we set off and I immediately got the first check wrong, but was still ahead by the 2nd. Wrong again, and as I came back Square Rooter was calling from up the hill. It seemed a long way to the paper – at least 101 metres, and as said CW would never go above 100m. Sure enough the sweeping CW called me back. Over half the pack, including all the FRBs were already careering up the hill but I dutifully went back to find the real trail.

It was around the lake and as I passed Burrito Butt, I realised I would be on my own for a while! Foxy Cleopatra, Itchy Bitchy & Quiet Please were there to support, and after a couple more km we got back to where Square Rooter had led the pack astray. I wouldn’t be seeing them again, but finally CW came into view doing a reverse sweep and dynamically setting and resetting the run.

All smiles back at the circle. Most were happy to have short cut and dived straight into the beers. The circle had some good moments, most notably Suckit’s hoorah before heading back again.

Sat 18th May – CSH3 – Chilly Pussy

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When Chilly Pussy and Anything get together, they are evil… Last year they set the 2 most brutal runs of the year, what would today have to offer?? Belly Dancer had to make his own lunch as Anything wasn’t back in time from setting it – ominous! I’ve not really run for a few weeks, but None of Your Business was keen to go along, so I dragged myself out to the runsite – near Ob Kham.

We set off and for the first km or so there were no checks – Chuckie and I just ran along together until the trail turned right into a familiar quarry area. THe first V check had CW go up the hill and me go around the bottom – I hit the check back, but there are only 2 real options, and both trails meet up again, so I paralleled. We lost sight of paper a few times, but picked our way to a circle, after which the trail started heading up. Man it was hot!

We climbed with Skiddy not so far behind with I Got Gas. Another couple of checks had me and CW working as a team, with a group within earshot behind. The trail arced up a ridge to the critical point – is it going left or right? Right seemed further, but it was back towards Chilly Pussy’s house, and where Belly had been seen darting off towards at the start of the run.

We were still out in the middle of the jungle, and a circle check. It turned out to be the last circle check, even though there was a good few km to go, complete with twists and turns. Brutal? Yes, very! Anyway, I got it wrong, and made a bad call arcing around, so ended up way off the pace. Did I mention the heat? And my trainers were causing blisters. We still had a few hills to go. Up and down, aaaargh!

I saw Square Rooter behind me, and finally caught up with I Got Gas, Skiddy, and saw some guy from Phuket a bit ahead. It turns out Throbbing Ninja snuck through while I was checking as well, and she ran a phenomenal run. Where did that come from? The last runners were in the dark. Brutal – yes!

On On On at Barbindoll’s new restaurant – the good turn out had them struggling for chairs! 😀

10th March – CH4 – Wooly Jumper

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Wooly doesn’t run often on a Sunday, but with a few days notice that she was on the hareline, she teamed up with Cumalot to set the run. Along the Maejo road, but not as far as the town – a new location for me. I wonder why nobody else has set a run here? Ok, so now I know!

Parking just off the main road, we gathered bemoaning our hangovers from the night before. Evil Big Top didn’t even make it, and she was the blame for my and Poo’s sorry state. Reluctantly we set off on the run, with the intention of putting in minimal effort. Within a km we headed out into the rice paddies, and Chuckie bailed on his second run in 2 days.

The run was a lot of rice fields, combined with some moo bahn street running, although there was an excellent 100m or so past a golf course! Mr. Poo was leading the way late on in the run, and lead Graven and some virgins a good 500m or so off paper. Humperdick and I showed the way back through some rice fields until we met Belly Dancer and Throbbing Ninja – not on trail, going the wrong way, near the trail. Huh?

Belly Dancer’s weight loss strategy – do short cuts, but don’t drink beer. Oops!

Anyway, we got back and spent sometime waiting for Foxy Cleopatra, who spent her time going around in circles doing the trail again and again!

27th January – CH4 – Anything & Throbbing Ninja

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Anything & Throbbing Ninja teaming up to set the run…. Run that past me again? Throbbing Ninja has a historic reputation for welcoming a group of visitors from overseas by setting one of the biggest hill climbs in hash history (recently surpassed by the ball breaker, but epic nonetheless). Anything has set some good runs, but you can be sure they will always be a tough test. I was worried!

We set off onto the road and back on a familiar trail through the field. Angry Inch was on my heels, and immediately my calf started tightening up. I just hoped I’d run it off and it did seem to ease off, but my legs were definitely feeling the effects of Frozen’s run the day before.

The pack was kept together as we searched for paper with the hares laying trail on the left, and then the right, and then the left, and then hiding it in trees (so it wouldn’t get burnt?). The road took us up and we finally got to a check. Angry Inch must be obsessed with my ass, and he followed me around the corner as Chuckie spluttered. It was HRA tho that checked the other way and when I turned back at the check back, sure enough CW was also behind me!

The next opportunity took us up into the hills and most of the run was on the great trails up in the mountains. Our visitor from Florida couldn’t stop smiling – he’d loved it! As we came down the hill there was a breakaway of Mr Poo, Angry Inch and now named (Cheap) Hole Hunter being chased down by HRA, myself, Chuck Wao and Graven Image. There were some excellent places for checks, but no checks as we back and forth up and down at the edge of the hills. Finally we hit the trail at the bottom and it was home free. I slowed to a walk and was gradually passed by Skiddy, Unplugged, Human Ex, while Crazy Crack & None of Your Business were close behind. Actually a great run that was a little much for me, with my only criticism being not enough checks at certain points!

Back in time for the circle….. Yikes!

5th January – CSH3 OUTSTATION – Byte My Yahoo & Unplugged

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Looking back over my history running with CSH3 – the first Outstation of the year was usually in February – time enough to recover from the ‘festive season’. Dr Byte must have had some ingenious plan for making the OS the first run of the New Year.

Having survived the end of the World, 1111 and the Fiscal Cliff – just what did the virile duo have in mind? Mae Moh is home to the largest open pit lignite mine in Thailand (extra fascinating info here – http://www.mine-planning.com/Homepage/publications_documents/maemoh.pdf). I had Googled the location and Dr Byte had posted a couple of tempting photo’s to whet our appetites’.

The Friday before was a ‘golfing day’ – I hear this was a great success with one beer per stoke after the 4th hole, and this was followed by a night of drunken debauchery I can’t even begin to write about.

Perhaps wisely I set off on Saturday with Mr Poo and Knockout – what a delight, Knockout sitting up front with me was Poo’s desperate plan to make me drive ‘sensibly’ – and I did – more time with Knockout – thanks Poo – your very lucky and hope you both will be very happy. En route Dr Byte called and asked us to get some powder – huh!? This was a bit ominous – earlier in the morning he called me – and I thought it was some deranged pervert heavy breathing down the line – had he been laying trail or laying Unplugged!!??

Duly we arrived at the EGAT facility with its small town of 1970’s box student dorms – Dick Tracy was the first we encountered and I decided to leave Mr & Mrs Poo to settle in while take a quick look at the mine and power plant.

Behind the power plant were some very tempting looking hills (mountains) – Horny Monkey knew I’d like it here – and I did!

OK OK – enough pre-amble, so what was the run like?

The hares had organised a luxury (compared to the songtheow) coach to take us to A – Wow! – what a place to start a run – a platform sticking out over the valley with the mine and reservoir below – very cool indeed!

So photo op and moment to catch up friends – good to see Big Top and Red Carpet back in town. The hare brief was given an Dr Byte and Unplugged wanted a 2 min head start for an initial live hared section (hence the powder call). Unplugged was clearly visible going up a tower to no-where (that only Horny Monkey gamely went) while BmY arced off to set the real trail. Dick Tracy and Sunspot ignored the 2 mins and raced after him. Dick the Boy Wonder was valiantly trying to delay us by singing some obscure/obscene Texan Hash song – but as the 2 mins popped up – off I went.

Sunspot has been running pretty well of late and had probably 500m under his belt, with Dick Tracy racing ahead – I had to run him down to get to the first check. I’m sure BmY was delighted at the 500m checking I did – wrong! He was chuckling away at the check and rightly predicted I’d catch up with the pack soon enough.

In the middle of ‘thorn forest’ – the checks were tricky and did really well confusing the hell out of us with FRB lead changing frequently. Horny Monkey and Skid Mark seemed to be most energetic – taking it in turns to find the Skiddy Stix. HRA seemed to be getting nearly every check wrong, until he lucked out and the ‘thorn tunnels’ section of the run.

Here HRA used his advantage and powered ahead with Big Top, Game Set & Snatch, visitor Skiddy, Shagless, Red Carpet, Pamala, Mr Poo and me in pursuit.

For the short cutters there was a convenient road parallel to the ‘tunnels’ – so they easily kept up with Thobbing Ninja and Superman enjoying our shrieks at getting skewered with thorns and stickers every few meters.

Looking to the East – there were gorgeous mountains were crying out for a (Lanna?) hash on/up then, but BmY would have none of that – dirt, stickers, cow shit, flat, flat and more flat were on his mind and he joyfully kept popping up at every other check to marvel at how well he was keeping the pack together.

The highest elevation change was a mere 4 meters – but it was great fun. Just under 7km we came On In to the waiting coach – overlooking the stunning valley as the sun was beginning to set. Everyone came in close together – Frozen Dick was in ahead of the foragers – Cumalot, Super Bitch and Throbbing Ninja.

Screwed Up ran his first run since his knee op and well deservedly got the Male Wings.

The circle was joyful and fun – beer flowed and humour grew as the sun set over the valley – excellent job hares!


Elevation Gain Criminals!!

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Given that everyone knows I hate hills…. 😉 Since I got the GPS, here are the biggest elevation differences:-

1) 440m – 15th Jan 2012 – The Ball Breaker – Frozen & Humper Dick. OK, it was the Ball Breaker… Once a year, I forgive you!

2) 387m – 29th Dec 2012 – Skid Mark’s Xmas Lanna Run… Remember that bastard hill? At least we had miles of rice fields to recover in!

3) 299m – 25th Feb 2012 – Belly Dancer (& Square Rooter)’s Lanna Run – Evil, evil, evil… Pure evil!

4) 293m – 20th Oct 2012 – Throbbing Ninja – Around half the distance and half the time of those above – Throbbing Ninja welcomed our guests with a truly evil ascent. One of the toughest CSH3’s I can remember.

5) 283m – 22nd September 2012 – Hollow Legs – remember when he dragged us straight up, and couldn’t be bothered to find a way back?

6) 253m – 26th February 2012 – Anything – who could forget when Anything set the run by Doi Kham? Only Humperdick did the full trail… When I got the scout report, the trail should have been 438m elevation change – which would have put it #2 had I not made my way back to lower ground…

7) 246m – 4th March – Itchy Bitchy – If I recall this was the 400th run, which Anything again had a say in… I seem to remember short cutting this and still it reports at 246m elevation gain – is this the GPS reading I stole from BD?

8) 231m – 1st January – Mr. Poo – To shake off the new years day hangovers he chose to not take us up the hill once, but twice. Behind Wat Umong, a memorable run for all the wrong reasons!

9) 214m – 6th October – Cool Balls – The outstation at Khun Yuam… I think this was all on the B->C part of the run!

10) OK, I have my sets stored too… and I can’t avoid it, one of them should make it to this list…:-
? 216 – December 27th – remember the Christmas Spirit run?
? 204 – January 28th – remember across the dam towards Doi Saket?


20th October – CSH3 – Throbbing Ninja

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Whoa! That was a run we won’t forget for a long while… What on earth was Throbbing Ninja thinking??? Even the Lanna run didn’t go that high up that bloody mountain…

I arrived to find a packed out runsite – a nice garden restaurant turned over to the hashers for the evening. We took over and with a strong contingent from Hong Kong it was going to be a busy one. The briefest of harebriefs set us off down the usual out trail, and I lead the string of HK’ers until Ice Dancer overtook and stopped calling – silent running cnut.

We got to the hill and climbed, and climbed and climbed… Every check was UP with nearly 300m of elevation gain. An epic which had us doubting whether Throbbing could have set it by bike or not. Eventually she must have got bored of climbing and randomly cut abruptly left to scramble through shiggy and descend back down to the waterfall. WTF?

The larger than usual circle was fun, and at the OnOnOn, TN made up for the crappy run with some most excellent food.

24th July – CH4 Run – Humperdick

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Today Humperdick set the run as his first solo virgin haring – and he has clearly picked a lot up during the time he’s been running as he set a great trail. It was well marked and had a good mix of trail running and shiggy scrambling! The turnout was better and the atmosphere was good and we set off – with plenty of flat ground around, the hare immediately took us up.

After screwing up the first check, His Royal Anus hit the front and successfully chose the right route at the next several checks leaving the rest of us scrambling to get back on terms. Finally we hit a random check back and HRA set off in completely the wrong direction – almost everyone was back together with HRA way behind. Chuck Wao took the lead as we went up the 2nd hill dragging Horny Monkey along behind him until they missed the paper and let Byte My Yahoo and HRA find the trail back down the hill. With HRA back in front he had the choice at the next couple of checks and was going well until Chuck Wao outfoxed him at the end.

Everyone came back to the circle fairly close together, except for Frozen Dick, who we could hear shouting in all directions until he finally came in (on trail). The circle was intimate as is often the case, with Chuck Wao taking on the role of acting, acting, acting Religious Advisor. Throbbing Ninja got plenty of attention – mostly due to her dog management skills. Humperdick had organised a nice cozy On-On at his girlfriend’s place topping of a pleasant evening out. Good work virgin hare!