Tag Archives: Skid Mark

25th July – CH3 – Shagless

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A Shagless run from the flatlands in between the Hang Dong Road and the river. This is Skidmark land! Harebrief over, and we set off, with only CW and I making any early efforts. A V-check, and I went left, paper, paper, paper, nothing, nothing, nothing… I hunted around for a check back, but none to be seen – fortunately CW called ONON to the next check, and the checks were coming fast! I love it! Straight back into the mix as everyone was going wrong, but plenty of checks had everyone milling around together. At last I managed to string a sequence together and got a bit of a lead – the trail turned right and arrived at a “bridge”.

A bridge:-
noun
1.
a structure spanning and providing passage over a river, chasm, road, or the like.

I guess that is a fairly loose definition of a bridge… But does a thin piece of bamboo casually dropped across a raging river count as a structure? It certainly spanned the gap, but it didn’t provide passage for this hasher. I put a foot on it, and thought better of it. Ack. So frustrating! I could see a check on the other side, and I could also see paper in the distance to the left… But I couldn’t get over… The clock was ticking, and shortly CW arrived with Sloppy. They politely asked me to get out the way, and danced across the treacherous balance beam. Damnit!!! I tried to find another way… And when I say I tried to find another way, I mean it – It took me around 2.5km, but eventually I found another way across.

Sadly by that time, and by the time I found paper again, I was a long, long, long way behind. Not much later, there was another bridge, that just seemed to have a little too much balance requirement, so again I went back and found a safer crossing. I was sorely tempted to head home, but I also needed the exercise, so I carried on. Eventually I saw Tiptoe, Does Nothing and Bone Smoker ahead, and slowly reeled them in as we crossed the rice fields, but when we hit the road they ignored it and turned left to short cut their way back. It was tempting, but I turned right and pushed myself over more dodgy bridges, and finally made it back to the circle some time after the majority. Good run, if you like that kind of “bridge”!

25th June – CSH3 – Sloppy Rod

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Too bad Sloppy Rod was sick… Full credit to the guy for phoning CW Friday night to say he might need a hand, and then still getting out there to leave us a trail, even though he missed out on the beers. Clearly it had been well scouted too.

The runsite was used back around the male hash 1000 run, when Skiddy stole it from the 1000 hares. I had some memory of some of the trails near there, but Sloppy took us a completely different way, so most of the run was new to me. We set off over the dam wall, and I was the only one inclined to run early on, and was alone at the first check. I picked up the hill, expecting us to turn right and head down into the valley. I nearly gave up, but picked one more tree to get to, and there was the paper. Was that only 100m?

I pressed on, up and over the hill, to another circle. What a strange place? Was it back to the ridge? Did we need to go up over the hill? It looks like a big hill, but maybe? The circle was on one trail, while another was clearly visible just below. I guess I’ll try that one then. Wrong… Damnit! I got back and tracked down to another circle. Cuckold had got there first and charged off straight, a visitor had gone down to the left, so Piggy & I headed up hill to the right. I was still thinking we would go back to the right, and not around the lake. Apparently the visitor was scared of spiders, so didn’t really check down to the left, which explains why Piggy & I were so far off course checking up the hill.

When we rejoined trail we had to negotiate our way past the walkers, with Obscene being the most determined – determined to let us witness him being stung by nettles! I could see the pack stretching out ahead and it was clear we were heading around the lake. Finally a circle check, and it was called after we’d all past it in the same direction – Piggy went back to lay trail correctly. A group reformed as we got to the W/R split. The W did look appealing, but it would just be back around the lake, so I joined the Rambos as we set off away from the A. A great check.

We spread out up the hill. Turkish had gone straight on the trail, and there were suggestions that he had just fucked off and not called. Finally it was called along a nice little trail that wasn’t spotted for sometime. Meh! When it was called I was well up a scramble up the side of a hill, and there was no quick way back down. I got back on trail, well behind, and decided to settle into conservative mode. ABB just behind me, and as we went through another check Cuckold ran past, up the hill…. in the wrong direction… with HRA… Did they correct the trail they laid? Nope… I continued trudging, waiting to see what happened up front.

Finally we got to a circle check on a ridgeline, where there was an unappealing trail leading back down to the left. It was unappealing, it didn’t look quite right, and for exactly that reason it was my first choice. Turkish could have picked it, but he preferred to bide his time standing at the circle. Lazy fucker! It was that stage of the run, where we knew the route back was coming soon, and he didn’t want to gamble on the wrong way down the hill. I admit I wasn’t quick to check, and I wasn’t quick to call, when I did I felt more energy and started running.

Another check – go with the gut, and set off to the right, sure enough there was paper. A few obstacles to pass, and behind me was Turkish & Piggy. The trail dropped down onto a larger trail, and there was TipToe and Motorboat. We were close to home. I had to keep pushing. The trail turned a corner, and went up hill… again? Argh! This was one hill I was going to run up, and as I crested the hill I turned back and saw Turkish & Piggy someway behind, and a mass of paper ahead. I nearly called OnIn, until I realised it was another circle that had already been kicked out. We weren’t far, surely there wouldn’t be a sting in the tail? Fortunately there wasn’t, and I follow Shagless in, as he came off the W trail.

The Malaysian visitors set off very late, and briefly popped in for a mention at the start of the circle before heading off to other engagements.

27th Sept – CSH4 – Knock Out

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I got a phone call before getting to the runsite to say they’d run out of signs, so if I got there first I might want to put some signs up… – if only I knew where we were going! Way down the river, so far that Turkish & Chuckie got lost and gave up, while Rin, Stuart, Belly and Anything got lost and were late. Those of us that did make it to the start were ready for Skiddy’s farewell hash. Skiddy will be seriously missed from the Chiang Mai hash community – a complete hasher who does more than his share of setting, organising and making sure the hash works throughout the year. Lets hope todays run will be a fitting tribute to him!

A flat run, in the orchards – surely there would be some water crossings? Brownie and I set off at the start with him promising me that I could have first pick at the first check. It wasn’t really a surprise that the check was skiddy sticks, so gee thanks – I got them… It wasn’t a surprise, but ALL the checks were skiddy sticks… The checks worked really well, and we were zig zagging, criss crossing, all over the place trying to figure out the route. With trails all over the place, it was tempting to start looking for true trail before the sticks were found, but who knew when the false trail would be reached?

The trail was pretty similar to one we’d done before by KO, so some parts were a bit predictable, but the checks were so hard! A normal circle check gives us a radius of 100m in a circle – i.e. an area of 31415.93 square metres to search for paper – bloody hell that is a lot! However, if the trail can be 100m back along the trail and 100m of either side, we add a 20000 square metre area – i.e. Skiddy checks like this changed the search area from 31416 square metres to 51416 square metres – at times we might have had more luck finding MH370.

Running along we were often wondering if we’d missed a check, or missed some paper – a good mental exercise. The checks were keeping us well together, nobody getting any advantages. Finally we got to a check that really foxed us. With hindsight, we were searching too far back from the sticks. I went the most obvious way, and had gone 100m and back, but nobody had found paper. Humps asked if I’d really checked it, so I went back and went further. No calls, so I kept going, and finally got out on a road. Paper Everywhere!!! It was going left, right, straight, all over the place! BUT, it was clear that I hadn’t found the trail the way the hares intended…. Still no calls from the pack… I went back and forth along the road trying to figure out what we were supposed to be doing, or where the paper was supposed to have come from… Still no calls.. I could see Piggy on the other side of a field, so called over to ask for help with the mystery. He headed in my direction bringing much of the pack, as we all short cut around 3km off the full run.

Not far around the corner it was the OnIn… Excellent checks that did a great job of keeping the pack running around like confused lemmings. Confused lemmings that like jogging along hunched down to avoid the tree branches.

28th July – CH3 – Ting Tong

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With Skiddy the co hare, and the location being flat Lamyai country to the south of the city, what did we have in store? The first clues came on facebook, where Skiddy announced he had lost yet another phone, and that Ting Tong really was ting tong. Ominous signs!

I wasn’t feeling too good, but I dragged myself to the run site, and with hare brief telling us it would be ‘fun’ with a special surprise for us, we were off (hoping the surprise would be a beer stop!). Turkey led the way through some horrible shiggy, where we just picked our way avoiding the brambles, out onto a little road. Circle check and we split up. When Turkey does call On On he calls with such joy in his voice and we ran over to him to endure some more shiggy. Another check, and we finally broke out onto a wide area of freshly raised land – where the trucks come and dump mud to raise the land above the flood plain – mud is only flattened a bit, so when it gets wet (which it had), it turns into a sludgy pit. Feet were already getting encased in mud. The flood lake to the left we again followed Turkey to the end of the lake, and when he called circle check, we could already see the paper leading us around the other side of the lake – yet more gooey, sludgy, mud to struggle through.

In many ways I get an advantage, paying less attention to the state of my feet that say Chuckie does, so I emerged from the pit of slime just ahead of Turkey. Next circle and he followed me down to check at the road. That was the last I saw of him… I turned back and well, there was a bridge, so we’d probably be using it?! Sure we would! The next section weaved its way through some farms and crossed a road to a circle check at the edge of a rice field. A few steps to the right, and I spotted something white to the left of the rice field – closer investigation and I was on, along the edge. Another circle, with limited options, but to go to the road ahead. More farm, and more roads to cross… Some how I was managing to stay a bit ahead of Pigshit, and Chuckie just a bit further behind.

Finally got to another road, with a circle check. I was slightly torn, but went straight over again, with Piggy right on my tail. He muttered something about making sure I called it as he reluctantly checked another way. I ran it out, and sure enough called at the end when I turned the corner straight into a flooded, muddy field. This would slow them down a bit?! I ran through calling On. Finally some solid ground on a burr, and I could turn and watch Chuckie gingerly pick his way through, while Piggy ploughed on like a kid playing in waves at the beach. One last check, and there was something white flickering across the field. My luck was in, and as I emerged onto the road, I could see the restaurant just along to the right.

So focused on the restaurant, I took the long way around, and missed the shorter route through the gardens. Sadly Piggy didn’t miss it, and sprinted ahead of me calling On In. Nice going.

21st July – CH3 – Chuck Wao

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11km south on canal road – a bit of a trek, but I sloped out of work and headed down to see what he had in mind. The crematorium, and no doubt the familiar trails behind it. A modest crowd assembled, missing some regulars, but swelled by the visiting Cabbage Patch, the returning Head Hacker and soon to be named ‘Pee On Me’. Looking around, I suspected I would need to do some work finding the trail…

We set off and Pee On Me, Skiddy and I arrived at the first circle together. Setting the circle around the corner gave a big hint as to where the On In trail might be, and already my mind was racing ahead on trail. Sure enough, I picked the first check right, and then the 2nd took us along the fence at the side of the temple. Lovely running trails, and I jogged along enjoying it. We had to turn right sooner or later, it was just a case of picking the right trail. Nice, I nailed it, and a long, long stretch for me to open up the legs on. Calls faded behind me – could I keep up my luck?

Finally a circle check on a main ish trail, so I took a moment or two to double check my bearings… It gets very disorienting along those trails at times, so once I knew where I was, I opted for the small trail that isn’t completely obvious – after 100m, I called “On On” into the silence behind me. How long would my luck hold out? A few more checks and I found my self looped back around to the right, climbing through shiggy. From away to the right, a faint call, I called back, but it was fruitless, the rest of the pack were the wrong side of a gully, heading on the loop I’d just done.

Rare do you nail every check in a hash, and sure enough, finally the hare got me at a cross check. It seemed like time to head back, so I picked straight on – check back. From there I could arc up through the shiggy to the other trail, and again, check back. Back to the check leaving one option, so I neatly kicked the check out for the rest of the pack, and headed on. One more circle check had me a bit muddled, but with silence behind, I found trail and headed towards the OnIn.

There was one final F*ck You from the hare, with a dummy false trail off to the left. I picked up the paper and reset it before heading back for a beer. Nice one Chuckie, but I had you pegged! Good circle – I hadn’t planned on staying for it, but hey, hopefully I’ll get on top of things tomorrow…


(No, I didn’t short cut!)

14th July – CH3 – Sloppy Rod

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Feeling a bit jetlagged & hungover today, so quite lazy to go hashing, but it was Sloppy Rod, and he is normally a good hare, so I made the effort. Incredibly detailed instructions took us to the reservoir just past the Tiger’s Head, and I was immediately looking forward to the run. Starting from half way along the lake, we had to be hitting the great flat trails at the end of the lake.

Sure enough, once we’d moved vehicles & beer around in circles, we had a hare brief and set off. I set off at a jog, and got a couple of checks right, with calls fading away behind me. Excellent running trails and I stretched out. We dipped off the main trail to follow a creek bed for a bit, but soon climbed back out onto the trail – I should have just stayed on the trail – no one would have known!

Finally we hit a circle, and I was torn – it seemed to be about the right time to turn and I had a feeling we could head back to the right without intercepting trails. So why didn’t I check that way? Instead I continued forwards looping around to the left and finally getting back to the circle as Pigshit arrived with Chuckie. So much for the lead – especially as Piggy picked the last option and got away from me. The late arriving HRA stood at the circle screaming at people as he didn’t seem to realise he had caught up already.

Then I started going backwards through the pack, tired and unfit Chuckie, Piggy, Turkey & HRA took off ahead of me, while Skiddy fell in behind. We sped up when we found Humperdick pruning a bamboo tree in the middle of the trail. He was going backwards for some reason.

Excellent trails throughout, and well marked – cheers hare! Wish I had my GPS so I could look at the route in more detail for future reference!

23rd June – CH3 – Turkish Delight

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Turkey teamed up with I Got Gas to set yet another run from Huay Tung Thao – I’d left the sign there a month back and we’ve used it again and again…. This time we were inside the park, so we’d have to be doing something a little different. We set off away from the lake in the direction of the army base. An early check had Chuckie leading the way up a small hill, and when I got to the top, he lead us down again.

Fortunately I got lucky heading to the right, and then nailed a good check off up to the left. Knowing we were pinned in between the Army base, and the 2nd lake, we had to be heading back to the left. Nobody would be daft enough to head into the army base, especially while there was a coup on, and you could hear gun fire from a training exercise not far away. We exhausted the options to the left of the lake, before Skiddy found paper on the trail that goes nowhere. Clearly unscouted, once we got to the bank of the lake, the hare hacked his way through the shit along the side of the lake until he got to the barbed wire fence, which he duly took us into the base.

We tracked down the road heading towards the barracks, watching out for stray bullets. Until suddenly we ran out of paper… Uhoh… No check, just no paper… I carried along the obvious trail that heads away from the road, and after around 200m or so I finally found paper. Not sure what had happened there – had the run been sabotaged, or had the hares fucked up? Again we headed cross country until eventually hitting some reasonable trails.

I got another couple of checks right, but could hear Piggy not far behind me. Another check, and I gambled on a trail back to the right, but sadly Turkey wasn’t that smart, and had used the obvious straight on one. Time to hustle, and I put my foot down to catch up with Piggy & Chuckie at a barbed wire fence where the trail turned left. They were just along to the left, and called another circle check. Interesting… We weren’t far from home, and there was a hole in the fence – and there on the other side, a nice piece of paper dangling off a leaf! I pointed it out to Skiddy and we set off… “On On” and not long after “On In”. Gotta love hashing! 😉

12th June – CH4 – Skid Mark

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What do you expect from Skiddy, particularly when he picks a factory out in San Kampaeng rice field country? As I pulled into the runsite the rain started, and it continued through the harebrief and out onto the run where Snail Trail set off with an umbrella! Along the road for a long way before we saw paper dripping, hanging off a tree – was this how the run would be? Finally the rain eased and we paddled our way through muddy paddy fields – Chuckie was hating every minute, while Piggy was like a Pig in Shit, running along ahead.

Various checks passed, and at each I found myself either checking the wrong way, or slipping and sliding my way along behind. The run hinged on a single check that must have wasted 15-20 minutes. Over a little bridge and a circle check that had hashers spread out across yet another rice field. Chuckie and I checked the less obvious options before the bridge, while HRA found paper in a trail, but lacking confidence in a senior moment decided not to call it and to carry on checking instead… Finally we called Skiddy and with some inside information we got back on trail.

Finally we hit some nice running trail, and it was enjoyable briefly, until we we back into the paddy fields scrambling through the scratchy weeds that have grown in the off season. The lead swapped around and at one point I found myself on the wrong side of a canal that was too far to jump or paddle. Fortunately there was a way across a bit further up, and I lucked out with the checks. Trail difficult to spot in the rice fields as the hare used up all his leftover papers and that brought us all back together shortly before the On-In. I didn’t see the On-In as I took a detour to avoid yet another balance beam.

Could have been a much nicer run without the rain, and without HRA thwarting our efforts!

6th April – CH4 – BMY & CW

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It was the day after BMY and Big Top’s fabulous “mini” ball breaker (circa 15k = mini???) and I was looking forward to an easy, scenic hangover run through some of the beautiful countryside we are so blessed to find in abundance surrounding Chiang Mai.
Dr Byte and Chucky Whoooooooooooo had promised us something special – a live hare run to impress the many visitors who had joined us on the Sunday Happy Hash as a precursor to the celebratory 1000th CH3 run on Monday.
All through the previous week, the hares had suggested some charming hills and complementary flat trails – Chucky the supremo uphill gardener haring the hilly bits and Byte making sure we didn’t get to deploy the KY gel on the flat bits.
And so, after convincing our visitors on the songthaew they were in for a treat, it was a bit of a surprise when we arrived at the A site – a concrete shell of a house on a large dusty building site full of similarly incomplete, ghost-grey structures. Not to worry I thought, the lush green hills were only a short distance away. Surely we would be heading in that promising direction . . .?
The hare brief was suitably brief, with BMY suggesting the girls set off 10 seconds after the hares and the men a full 20 minutes after . . . mooh-ha-ha-ha! But the girls didn’t fancy the idea for some unimaginable reason and we all headed out on the chase after the obligatory five minutes had elapsed.
Belly Dancer spurted forth like a lame hippo in a tutu straight towards the main trail leading up into the hills, ignoring the paper trail the hares had set. Did he have inside info? Or had he been “misinformed” by the devious hares? Sadly it turned out to be the latter. The trail led us out into an open expanse of fields where a centrally placed circle check had us checking left towards the hills. But alas, the hares, intent on fucking over the FRBs at any cost and ensuring their own anal virginity – well at least for the purposes of this run – turned right, right back into the construction site via an un-happy-hash-like gully where I was fortunate enough to be on hand to give Itchy and Sleepsy a hand down and then a conveniently placed hand back up again – mooh-ha-ha-ha.
More grey dust trails, past more grey shell houses and over a familiar main road; and then we reached the familiar criss-cross warren of running trails used by the local fitness community. Good flat running trails. Many checks to hold us back. Lots of puffing and panting after yesterday’s “marathon”.
And then we emerged from the rabbit’s maze onto a flat, grassy field – it somehow reminded me of Newmarket race course – and back to the main, main road, where the trail led us back to the main road that we had previously crossed.
A long tarmac run; but this was Skid Mark territory and he rightly predicted the old favourite under-the-fence hole. So under we went and were thankfully off the tarmac and back on a dirt trail, the one with the familiar sneaky offshoot to the right, the one leading back to the building site and the A.
I followed the trail to the concrete fence surrounding the building site until I hit a false trail check back. So it was up and over the fence. None of Your Business found the trail on the other side and was first home, punching the air with obvious delight. There were a few stragglers but nothing to cause concern as the reliable Tip Toe was on hand to lead them on and in. Welcome back big man!
Great circle hares, but Big Top was probably right when she said that had it been any hash other than the Happy Hash, you would both have had willies over your heads for the tarmac and dust content of the run. But what do we care – this is the Happy Hash, right? Who needs willies when simple wit and humour will more than suffice?
As with most Happy Hash circles and on-ons (this time at the magnificent Sheryl’s), the magical blend of beer, good-natured splashes, fine food and welcome camaraderie, cast its spell upon us all and all thought and talk of the run eventually dispersed into a delightful alcoholic fog.
Good job hares! But I wonder what would have happened had None of Your Business caught Dr Byte before the end of the run . . . mooh-ha-ha-ha?????!!!!!
Ah, I do so love the Happy Hash!

20th Jan – CH3 – Skid Mark

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Skid Mark #3

If you are going to set 2 runs in a weekend, why not set 3? Seriously folks – that is a hell of an effort and deserves huge respect. Thanks Skiddy for a great weekend of hashing!!!

So how about today’s run? He’d been building up to it with the previous 2 runs and had hinted today’s would be something special – enough that I crept my way out of work and got to the runsite. We’d been here before, but not for a long time. It was an A->B, which always mixes things up.

I set off in usual style, and Brown Finger joined me at the front. The first check was after 700m or so and I guess I got it right… – at least I found some paper in a rice field and another circle check. I can’t be sure if we got there the way the hares intended, but what the hell! A bit further on, another circle next to a ‘bridge’ type thing that crossed some fast flowing water. It’s Skiddy, so of course we had to cross it right? Yup, and I was On-On past a paddy field to the road. Things were going well for me, and I hit another couple of checks. When I finally got one wrong it was Graven Image, Brown Finger and Turkish Delight mixing it up at the front.

We caught up with Sunspot who’d been given a huge short cut, but apparently confusing instructions…. – “At the V check take the RIGHT path”, which could have meant the path to the right, or the correct one. Anyway, bloody hell the pace was moving along fast. Less that 6.5mins per km is not a bad running pace, but when you add in the hashing checks etc. that’s moving along. Several times we thought we’d lost Turkish, but he was doing a great job of keeping up – calling when he got ahead and kicking checks out when he was following (Poo might argue that he kicked the checks in the wrongd direction, but perhaps Poo should run faster and get in less fights).

Finally we got to a strange “Wings and Other Things” or “Short Cut” check… Huh? We were close, and after a couple of twists and turns, we emerged and found the beer. A great 8km A->B run and in my opinion the best of the weekend’s runs. Thanks for the 3 runs!