Tag Archives: Chuck Wao

3rd June – CSH3 – Shagless & DGI

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The runsite was south beyond the known limits of humankind! I woke up thinking I probably wouldn’t bother, but when Sloppy offered me a ride, I figured I may as well go – it was Chuckie’s 400th run afterall! We set off early, dropping Sloppy’s shoes off and picking CW up before heading south. In a year, when the road is complete, it won’t be so bad, but it took a good hour and a half to get there!

The songthaew was of course late, just a little, and we were off just after the usual start. I jogged off and promptly went wrong at the first check. I checked too far, but by the time I got back to check we were no closer to solving it. WTH? All the pack were milling around – surely everything had been checked? I spotted Sheep Shagger in the field, just past some “scary” cows, pointing at something on the ground – JC headed towards him, and so did I. Sure enough he’d forgotten the words “ONON”, and finally we were off. I caught them up at the next check, and there was the hare on his bike. Hmmmm… I checked towards the hare, and spotted a road the arced around – I wasn’t on, but had a feeling I would be soon! Sure enough I ran into another circle, called it, and then tried to find the right way to get to it. From here the obvious way was over a concrete bridge? weir? I went over, and poked around for a bit, but found nothing. Going back the pack was converging, and the hare came along and hinted that maybe I hadn’t quite looked hard enough – I was back over the water, and this time got it, with Spitz Spunk hot on my tail.

We had a stretch through some dried out rice fields, which was quite tough going – it wasn’t easy to find the right pace as with every step your ankles got turned in different directions – walking was fine, but any kind of jog wasn’t easy. Sloppy got a lead, but it only lasted for 1 circle, before HRA took the front. The checks came quick and fast, and several times we went from circle to circle with the pack rotating nicely through a little village. Sheep Shagger egging me on with some short sprints. Clearly we were rotating right, and at some point we would have to cross the water again. Sloppy was leading again for a bit, and then HRA back at the front. Chuckie seemed to be constantly just off the front. I was working hard and finally got my break through an orchard. Finally I put together a sequence of checks and was trotting down a lane with CW not far behind.

The trail turned back into the uneven dried up rice fields, and with my knee / ankle history, I had to slow down. CW caught me up and we discussed the “obstacle” mentioned in the harebrief – clearly it was something to get us back across the water – if it was a balance obstacle, then I was fucked… if it was a wet feet obstacle, then CW was fucked! He slipped past, and after a longer stretch without checks, Sloppy appeared on my shoulder apparently with little regard for his ankles – he was in it to win it! He passed me at the beer stop. CW grabbed a beer and kept going, I grabbed a beer, and Sloppy just ran off – seriously? since when has Sloppy turned down free beer?!? It was a V check, but Shagless made it easy for me as CW & Sloppy were already heading in the right direction. I followed as other hashers were arriving and got to another circle by a rickety bridge.

CW had crossed the bridge and turned left. Sloppy had stayed this side of the water. I didn’t like the look of the bridge, but I knew home was the other side of the water and it looked as good an option as any. I gingerly edged my way across clinging to the metal handrails. As I got to the other side, CW was coming back from the left, but there was another fork, and he tried that one instead. He’d found a hash sign for the ONONON and was convinced. I made it across the bridge and headed to the right. Sheep Shagger almost caught me up as I finally hit paper…! I’d been going steady for a while, so I still had something in my legs. I made the call and ran!

One more check…. a V check… and when I hit it, it really was a 50/50. Damnit! I didn’t have enough time to be wrong. The mud trail to the left looked tempting – I took 2 steps that way, and then stuck with the road. Around a corner and I could see paper into the distance. Run Forest Run! Poor Sheep Shagger had no choice but to take care of my discarded trail, and so when it straightened out, and when I looked over my shoulder it was Chuckie trudging along behind. A final corner and there was the ONIN. Sorry Sloppy you didn’t get your “triple win”!

13th Feb – CH3 – Square Rooter

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Seriously Rooter? Are you fucking insane? WTF?! I’ve heard the philosophy of never let a good hill go to waste… and I’ve been on Turkish’s runs where he’s straight lined through shit to connect trails, and I’ve been on Belly Dancer runs where the sole intention is surely to take out half the hashers, but I can’t remember anything quite like today…

We know the area behind Doi Kham, I’ve hashed trails all around there, but clearly Square Rooter wanted to teach us something new today? The harebrief was clear warning – be wary about what was to come – walkers may as well go home, if you aren’t fit, just give up now… We set off, and set off gingerly… From the usual runsite we headed towards the “gully”. Last time rooter teased us with that trail before cutting straight back out to the right towards the regular trails (around “last man standing”). A couple of checks, and we were still heading up the dry river bed. Suckit commented that he’d never been that way before – I had, but when we carried on deeper, it was new for me too. I was interested – but surely there was a reason nobody had set runs there before?

After a km we got to the point Rooter had told us to turn back if not capable. A bit early, so most carried on. And then no checks for a while as the trail turned into a sheer climb. Sheer… Seriously – this went on and on, no trail, just straight up. So steep that trees couldn’t hold on to the side, and nor could the earth, with constant landslides – I felt sorry for whoever was behind me, but when I looked over my shoulder it was Turkey, so I didn’t feel quite so bad. Up ahead was Chuckie, Brownie and Suckit. They were only 40-50m away, but it might take a while for me to get there. We were crawling, scrambling, feeling out footholds. 28 minutes for 1km, in total 280m elevation change, but 170m elevation gain over 500m. It was complete insanity. I have no idea why anyone would attempt it once, let alone do it and then decide to make their friends do it?!

Finally we got to the “top”, or the ridge with a trail heading to the right up towards Doi Pui, or down towards the Sameong Road football field. It was already kicked out when Turkish, Piggy and I got there, and we started the descent. Taking it steady for a while as my legs got used to the idea of not having to climb, and gently easing into a run. Now the trail was a great running trail – nicely descending, if only it had all been like this! The sneaky lizard gizzard wizard colombian searching for lines of powder eased past us like he was very, very thirsty and had no qualms about sprinting down a steep hill. I kept my pace moving wondering if I would see the leaders again. We did, and managed to catch up at the bottom where clearly a few checks had slowed them down. Managed to come in not far behind, and watch as everyone else came in covered in mud – Sheep Shagger being almost the last back – midway through the circle…

Only the hare was later getting back – too ashamed to face up to punishment? I don’t remember a hash run quite so severe as this one, and I don’t remember a hare ever having to sit on ice for that long afterwards….

19th November – CSH3 – Frozen Dick

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Lets go backwards… The ONONON… I will never set foot in that establishment again – completely and utterly the most disgusting experience I have ever had, anywhere, ever. I have gained a reputation for getting bad service, getting my food last, or not at all…. I am trying to be composed and relaxed about it, and ordered a burger, reconfirming the order with the owner a while later. I have NEVER been shouted at by the (farang) owner of a restaurant after I didn’t get my dish. She didn’t care at all, initially blaming me for confusing her staff (by ordering a burger), and then blaming my friends for eating my burger!!!!! After 10-15 minutes of being shouted at by the owner of the restaurant, I went to say goodbye to my friends, whereupon she followed me and continued to shout at both me and the rest of the hashers. I trust that nobody will ever visit that restaurant ever again.

Backwards… The circle was good – the hare was heard to remark that often the better circles come after a fucked up run… Yes, Frozen, you know what is coming….

I arrived at the runsite and Frozen initially suggested I parked 100m or so away from the circle, which isn’t a great idea as beer monster. After a very long hare brief, we were finally set off with ambiguous instructions. We hadn’t even found trail when we were off paper with Obscene calling us on on old paper. Finally we were underway and I nailed the first couple of checks and then promptly got it wrong. Chasing back I was running up a bit of a hill, and we got to a couple of V checks before all hell broke loose. A circle check….

A circle check… a harmless circle check? We scattered… And we found paper…. Boy did we find paper… We found paper all over the fucking place!! And the hare had be kind enough to autograph ever piece of paper with “FDSS” (frozen dick and Sheep Shagger – note Sheep Shagger wanted nothing to do with it – he wasn’t even there). Sadly 90% of the paper we found had FDSS on it… And it was leading in all different directions! Several times we confidently set off following trail, only to run out of paper. Other groups of hashers were following other sections of trail, sometimes forwards, sometimes backwards… The only thing that was absolutely clear was… we had no fucking idea what we were supposed to be doing!

I ran back to the previous V check to check if it really was a check back on the other trail. HRA was running around talking about rubber tire bridges, and we shouldn’t cross them, the hare said so… Finally there was a huge “ONON” call, and all headed towards it, only to find Chuckie, calling us back to the circle and saying he was giving up and heading home… (except he didn’t know which way home was!) I pointed out where home was and told him how to get there back down the road, but also that it wasn’t the point of the hashing – I wanted to solve the mystery! We found another circle check and Angry Inch failed to find paper down the obvious road – at this point, just about everyone gave up and headed home, leaving only Brown Finger and I trying to figure it out. We followed a trail backwards, we knew the paper was backwards, and then when trail ended we were very close to “the circle” after doing a bit of a loop around. Things were making sense now, and back to the circle where everyone gave up. This time we approached from the correct direction, and with almost all other directions thoroughly checked, everything became clear like a flash of light – we turned left and headed into shiggy.

From there it was nice running trail, and Brownie kindly jogged along at my pace so we could run in together, overtaking HRA & Cumalot holding hands after the OnIn. Fun times!

http://labs.strava.com/flyby/viewer/#779862116?c=w5q61w6j&z=G&t=1OC2d4&a=ZMB7LlFYdi4

12th November – CSH3 – Sloppy Rod

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Mini Ball Breaker time. Sloppy and CW had scouted the shit out of this run, I had high expectations heading out to the runsite, this would be engineered to the highest level! The signs led us well past Baan Pong resort, which confused Sheep Shagger & Big Top, but finally we all got there ready for a slightly late start. The hare brief was thorough.

We set off, and although we were deep into the hills, the trails were immediately familiar – I felt like I was on a Belly Dancer run… Yikes! Familiar trails, so some familiar checks – I nailed the first few, even though the checks were cleverly placed, so the out trails weren’t obvious – memories help! We headed over to the rocket launcher lake and trail went the long way around a field before a circle check. My first instinct was to follow the main trails towards where the BB had gone, but after a quick survey, I picked across the dam. The trail had arced nicely around so that the route across the dam wasn’t obviously visible. Nice work hares – I thought I had them and headed to the dam… Nothing up on the dam, and nothing to be seen in the distance. Surely I was over 100m from the check? Damnit, I went back and headed down the obvious trail and TMB called out from the bushes that there was nothing there. I was flummoxed. Finally HRA called from over near the dam – the MOFO bastard hares had gone over the dam, but disguised their approach, and I must have been within inches of finding their paper on my first guess.

Over the dam we went, and then a Wimp Rambo split. From here the checks were less frequent – less opportunities to put checks as we entered a valley. I tried to keep pace, but also tried to save energy for the anticipated 13km. 3km in and I was feeling shaky. I was dripping with sweat. So much that anyone behind me on trail would have been slipping on the wet trails like a thunderstorm had been through. The trail turned upwards, and I hated it. I thought I was mentally ready for a 13km ball breaker, but at the first real challenge, I was broken. Climbing hills I try to keep the philosophy of keeping going, but today I am disappointed in myself. I broke. I paused and leaned on a tree, with sweat pouring off me like a thunderstorm. The pack passed. Some cursing, some screaming (ONON), most cursing to be honest… I stopped several times on the climb. It was steep – I think I have been there just once before – 20th May 2013 (does anyone have the GPS of Belly’s AGFU run???).

Finally we summited and Knock Out was there waiting for me, or probably Poo who was just behind me. We descended the other side, and I could hear people ahead, but the trail down (for me) was treacherous… I certainly didn’t feel comfortable at more than a walk, and mostly I was picking my footing to avoid falling over, or falling off. I was shaky, and hopefully wasn’t holding up the group of Poo, KO and ABB. The was a check ahead, and as I descended slowly towards it, it seemed there was a huge group of hashers just stood there, until eventually Cumalot called from further down the hill – why hadn’t the FRBs found it already? Was I back in it? Meh, the trail was still the kind of trail that I inched along and before long there was silence ahead.

Finally we levelled out and I started striding forwards, only to immediately turn my left ankle in a hidden hole. DAMNIT!!!!! I should just resign to this not being my weekend. As we came out into an orchard, KO said that it looked like where we set the run a few months back. Impossible, but my mind raced, and suddenly I knew where we were again. And as we turned left I was happy to know we were heading towards a really nice cut through back to the main big lake. Poo took off, leaving us behind, and I mixed walking and jogging to get through to the beer stop. Water stop? No water? WTF? No hares? From Strava the FRBs had set off just ahead of us, but when we got there, there was just an ice bucket of beers… It took less than a nanosecond for me to make a decision, and I made the true hashers decision to grab a beer. And a while later, Poo and I walked back to the A… Not what I had planned, and from looking at the maps, the end parts of the run look really interesting… Thanks hares!

The final moments of the run was Taste My Buns running in a couple of hundred metres ahead of Graven and Brownie – who weren’t holding hands, at least they weren’t when they saw us watching…

20th October – CH4 – Alice

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Alice is always the hare these days! But at least he is liking “my area” in Doi Saket… Except, his focus is on the other side of the canal to where I normally go. And despite teasing us today, he stuck with the area he has been scouting. A big turnout today, with 2 songthaews! With visitors and the returning Graven, we were a big pack to set off.

The first check was a no brainer – I’d seen the paper on the drive in, so I told CW not to bother with the alternative and ran off to confirm the On call. Then to the canal, and I was right again, convinced we were heading to the bridge. I didn’t spot it straight away as I was the wrong side of the road, but locked in and headed to the bridge I often use. A circle check on the exact same tree that I have stapled circle checks before. I was at home, and guessed through the abandoned moobaan. I know exactly where to place the 100m paper, and today there was no paper there. I checked a bit further, but nothing. I headed back to the circle and was even pondering going back over the canal when there was a call… We all stormed off only to find a confused Sex Pistol and Blows Herself… Apparently SP had called over to BH “was that an ONON?”

Poo found it from a goat trail back across the canal, and nicely regrouped we trudged down narrow shiggy trails for a bit. It was actually a neat connection – one that I should have used a few months ago, but last time I set there it was pissing it down, and I simply couldn’t be arsed to explore enough. Alice found a much nicer little trail, and there were plenty more options here – saved for the future! I got stuck in the pack for a bit, making little progress until we turned left, and the shape of the trail was coming clearer. Back to trails that I knew, and Angry Inch was charging along ahead, shortcutting to get there, but ahead… for now….

We ran past a soi, and my attention was alerted, not just because it went in the right direction, but also I thought I could see something white in the distance… Sure enough there was a circle check around the corner. I turned back and ambled up the soi, checking idly, while CW also clued in and joined me. Once we were duly convinced, we took off and found a V. I went left, he went right, and after a while I heard a muffled check back. The last few checks were going home checks and I managed to stay clear of the chasers and got to the hares final treat! A sick, filthy infested water crossing. I pondered for a nanosecond and then took the plunge. I hope I am still alive tomorrow as there was some filth festering at the bottom of that. When I saw the OnIn I couldn’t help but wait to see CW’s reaction as he arrived with Piggy.

Nice run – particularly liked Angry Inch finding the wrong canal and taking the long way home!

17th October – CH3 – Pigshit

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Piggy has caught me on the all time stats for CH3, so to put off the inevitable, I slipped out of my lab and made it to the runsite just as the run was kicking off. I changed while I listened to the harebrief… He was being frank and upfront – we weren’t going to like it, he didn’t expect many to do it, and we should bail out at any opportunity. After that, most seemed like they’d be happy enough sitting around for a beer rather than touching the trail! The warning was fair enough, I would heed it.

I walked for a bit at the start chatting to Alice, and relaxing from the day. We followed the usual route, and then a check at the split. Nobody calling, so I set off up the hill, for a few steps before Chuckie called us along the creek. I splashed through the puddles to annoy Sheep Shagger. Then when CW turned left up the hill, we all smelled a false trail. So I took 2 steps further on and found paper. I jogged along for a bit, and promptly realised I had left my inhaler in the car, during my rushed afterwork change. Damnit. Over half a K in, I nearly turned back, but decided to continue and try to control my breathing.

For a while I knew where this was going. A circle check, and I didn’t see him heading towards the Ag Center, and I would have been very impressed if he had found the trail over back around the top on short notice. I went straight on up, and sure enough found paper. Another check and I continued up, but then veered off to the left. Over 100, this wasn’t it, but it had to be up, and this trail was bending back to the right. In the end I hacked my way across a bit of a ravine and saw the paper continuing straight up the hill. I think behind CW was getting all the bad luck dutifully checking downhill each time.

Another check and again I went up, but this time, there was nothing. I came back down and watched while Angry Inch stood at the circle listening to Chuckie checking off to the left. The only other option was down, but he waited for me to go check there first. Sure enough down took us to the creek, and the “W” option to head back down. Tempting though it was, I followed trail a bit more and we crossed the creek and climbed a killed hill. I hate that climb after the creek… I guess the steepness just hits my elevation gain threshold? Every time I’ve done it, it saps my energies. Just a little too steep? After already climbing to there? I dunno, but when we plateaued there was no check. That told me a lot. False trail ahead? That was my hope… I hoped there would be a false trail, and nobody would be forced to climb higher up…. Did the hare know the trail goes to Doi Pui? I hunted around a bit looking for alternative paper, but there was none. HRA joined me as I started following trail again. We started chatting about the “W”, that he hadn’t seen, and we talked each other into turning back and heading down. We pretended Mr. Poo didn’t see us. At the plateau, where there was no check, we traversed to the other trail (60m) and sure enough found the rest of the trail heading down.

Sorry Piggy for not completing your challenge… But another 200m elevation gain after I pulled out? I think I made the right decision!

1st October – CSH3 – ABB & Angry Inch

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Maejo again – fantastic! We gathered near the Tiger’s Head, ready to see what ABB had in store. We set off, with Turkish energetically leading the way, and then trailing off a bit. I got to the first V check, and it was a complete 50/50 choice – I gambled left, and the trail continued, while TMB must have hit a check back – I heard Piggy calling OnOn in my direction, so kept on. Next up a circle… The cause of huge confusion!

The check wasn’t at a junction – just in a waterbed gully. So I continued straight, while behind Chuckie and Turkey lingered by the check – there had been a trail off to the right about 50m before the check, but they didn’t seem keen to go back. I spotted a strip of paper ahead of me, but it “didn’t seem right”… Normally after a check the paper is hidden to some extent on the side of a tree, so you need to go 100m before you find it – this seemed to find the most obvious tree and make it stand out. I didn’t call, but went over to investigate. Obscene, running up behind had no fear and he squealed ONON from 40m away, pulling the pack towards me. The strip of paper was at a mainer trail and I saw paper to the left, heading down the hill, until a circle check hidden on the back of a tree. I checked forwards until it was called back up the hill with Piggy tearing in half the very strip of paper I’d seen before to try to indicate we should turn right there. In reality we were completely wrong! Back up the hill, we were running backwards on trail, and found another circle that took forever to figure out.

Poo and I did another loop and got back to the same spot, finally figuring out what we’d done wrong, as we heard Piggy call us on. I ran down to Piggy and he was just stood in the jungle on his own calling “ONON” as loud as he could! Bellowing in the hope of bringing the pack back – a hash hero today! Ahead of him Sex Pistol was the only one who’d figured out what had happened sooner and was blazing a trail. Behind Poo and Turkish at least found their way, while the rest of the pack were somewhat slower rejoining the trail. Lucky the FUCK UP was so early on, that only HRA bailed out and gave up!

There was immense glee in Sex Pistol’s voice when she called ONON off a check, leading the FRBS. We set off to chase her down, and finally when we crossed the road, I hit the front, but the pack was spread out massively. Sex Pistol got caught out by the deadend behind the shelter we used last week, and instead we crossed the weir at the usual place. Piggy nearly catching me, but then reluctantly (heroically?) checking the option to the right. I pressed on, but of course promptly got the next V check wrong. I was still ahead, but Poo was breathing down my neck and when I paused for a moment unsure of whether we were on paper, he pounced and darted ahead. Enjoy it while you can, as shortly after he hit a circle check, but didn’t even see it. When I passed the trail to the right, I suspected another circle was coming, and so promptly ran back and slotted in with CW behind TMB as somehow they had caught up from the early misadventure! This was fun!!!

Another couple of checks and a final V check. TMB picked left – that is the obvious way, it heads towards the Tiger’s Head, so I commented to CW that she was probably right. I do apologise CW, I had her on a 10% chance… I checked straight towards the great trail that cuts over the hill, but bizarrely TMB called “ONON”. WTF?! How can she know? CW was confused but took off after her, while Turkish paused as well. I called “Checking” around the corner, over the gully and to the OnIn.

What an interesting run!!! The trails were 100% great! It was a great route, all on great running / hashing trails. I have no complaints at all. Checks are supposed to fuck us over, and boy some of these checks fucked us over, and some got fucked over more than overs, and in ways that the hares never imagined… but who cares? Great run, thanks hares!

29th September – CH4 – Alice

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Finally a run in Doi Saket! There are some great trails out here, and I’ve been looking forward to running someone else’s trail for so long. Alice like a master magician threw some misdirection at me last week, which worked – last time I trust him! 😉

Finding the runsite wasn’t straightforward, but we eventually grouped up and got ready for the run – would it start at 4:30? 5? or 5:30? Fortunately the hare seemed to know, and we were sent off at 5. Obscene skipping eagerly ahead at the beginning. I got a couple of checks right, particularly a hidden V check and a clear false trail, so I was way ahead, only to get royally screwed over when the hare decided not to cross the canal and head towards the Chinese Cemetery. Wow! My dream of the perfect hash was blown up, and I was playing catch up.

Today’s checks were clearly the work of a masterful hare, with pretty much all of them working to rotate the lead, and keep the pack together. There are better trails, but in terms of haring, and devious checks, it was spot on. I got back to the front a the smaller canal, when HRA spotted paper from the wrong side and had to come back. Another check at another bridge and then some confusing OnOn calls. I could have been right, but ended up so wrong after Toe Sucker confidently called on following HRA. I was wrong, badly wrong and met up with Angry Inch, who was also very wrong – we heard no On-Call, so Angry announced he would set off in a rough general direction. I was tempted, and chose another direction for a bit, before deciding to go back and be honest – amazing the “Strava effect”.


Back on trail, frustrating!!! I was so close to getting it first time, and now I was a long way back. Sometimes this scenario is game over, but even though we were heading towards home, the checks gave more opportunities to get back into the action. Back past the Chinese Cemetery, and everyone’s compass was pointing towards home. A nicer trail to the right lured several hashers and I caught up Piggy as he checked along the road to the left. A bit of shiggy, with a lazy water buffalo – makes you wonder – we do all this exercise, he wallows in mud, I was almost tempted to join him. Piggy got caught up on a nasty sticker scramble, to a circle. And a group formed again.

I smiled to myself! Everyone was going to the right, which was surely towards home, but surely now my home field advantage would finally pay off?! I went left, around the corner and sure enough there was paper! I was home free surely – not far to go now! The nice trail went off the road to the right, but there was no paper on it… Paper at the corner, but I was filled with a sense of doom as I headed towards it. I didn’t want to follow the road to the left, and when I found the FT there was no surprise. Damnit, damnit, damnit! Good job hare, you gotta love it when half the pack passes you so close to home. Chuckie got ahead, but he also got foiled by a V check almost at the death. In a scandalous break of tradition TMB gave Piggy the male wings and he gave himself the female wings too…. Ohohhh.. Really?!

17th Sept – CSH3 – TMB & Alice

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A long drive down to canal road, and gradually the sunset as I drove, for today was a full moon run. I arrived to confusion as someone decided to move the runsite, apparently scared of the full moon ghosts? We were set off at 7, torches in hand, and the paper was actually really easy to follow. At the first check, I eventually got it right, with Frozen spotting it in the distance before I did. I started putting a collection of checks together and put a bit of a spurt on the build up a lead – things were going well, until suddenly it hit me, I’m on my own… in the dark… This grass is really deep… “Snake!?” “Shit!”

Much of the trail was familiar, and yet so different at night. I got out to a mainer trail, and picked left. Yup, there was paper, but absolute silence behind me. The next junction had to be right, and sure enough paper again… This was going like a dream! I kept pushing and another circle. Based on what I’d picked up from the hares, I was sure at this point it was going to be clockwise, and we had to break to the right. Confidently I checked to the right… Nada… How about up this little trail? Nada, another one? Nada… So I got back to the circle, just as Toe Sucker arrived. So it was left – I guess left a bit more and then around further to the right?

I was still wrong and now Toe Sucker called on. I sped past her, wanting to continue my dream run, and of course turned right at the next check. I ran up the hill, but found nothing… I stood at the junction at the top in bemused confusion. Damnit!!! Finally there was a call from the left…. – Seriously this was going to be anti-clockwise afterall?!? I sprinted down the hill, angry at myself, and now deep into the middle of the pack, gradually picking off ABB, a visitor from the states and Cuckold. Another check and I arrived just as HRA called again from the left. OK, I can chase that old guy down!!! Angry Inch was running with me, but I upped the tempo and gradually opened up a gap on him, closing down on HRA, until from just ahead of me I heard “False Trail!”…. AAAAARGH!!!!!! We turned back and almost immediately there was the On call from Chuckie.

Excellent checks there, killed the racism in me perfectly! From somewhere Mr. Poo broke free, and apart from Turkish (who short cut massively), the blind man lead the pack out of the darkness to the beer! Excellent run – well thought out, using the right kind of trails for the conditions – I really enjoyed it, and running without the heat of the sun was really pleasant. From there the evening dragged on and on… A long gap after the run with food in the dark, before a long circle. I think I will struggle to stand up tomorrow, but because of standing through the circle rather than exertion on the run.

10th September – CSH3 – Knockout & Sex Pistol

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The runsite was the strawberry place in Sameong – a nice A-site with great views. At the top of a hill, the trail had to set off downhill – which is fine, except that it means the trail will finish uphill – there is no way to avoid a climb at the end… But we had that to look forward to, first the start would be downhill…

I set off with Chuckie, and while protocol is to walk at the beginning, nature took us into a brisk jog. A circle check, and I spotted paper quickly, but had to navigate a small gully before I could call ON – an obstacle that would soon cause Poo & Cumalot similar navigational challenges. It was still downhill, but now back on the road we drove in on – DAMN! I wish I had looked in my mirrors more as I drove to the runsite!!! The out trail was just following our drive up the hill! A V-Check, I went left, CW did the dummy run to the right – I was so certain I was on, and was going well until I hit a false trail – NICE JOB hares! Back along the road and this time CW, TMB and I were all caught out by an invisible V check leading to a check back.

Another couple of checks and we got to a circle where nobody really wanted to give up the high ground. TMB checked up, Turkish straight. A Thai virgin headed reluctantly down to the right. I was lured to the right too as though a wailing banshee was beckoning me. Checking downhill is always a risk, a risk you might have to climb back up, but there were no other calls. The virgin was just smiling, but not finding paper, so I tried a bit harder, and sure enough – it was a brilliant check, leading through a tight gully, climbing back out and on to the road. As I got to the road, KO’s car came skidding to a stop with an impromptu beer stop. Sweet! I grabbed some water, and was very glad I did later…

From here we had a bit of tarmac time, heading towards the quarries, and I had a nagging bad feeling about the inevitable hill… The checks up until the beerstop we great, but from there it was hard to keep the pack together. One circle was around 130m, which brought Chuckie back, even though we knew it had to be that way. He retraced his steps once he saw me persisting that way, and sure enough the paper was there. There was no way to avoid the hill, but we had 5km in our legs before we started…. Why oh why? KO? You don’t like us?

As the climb started I wasn’t far off the front, CW was 100m ahead of HRA, 100m ahead of me. I kept on going, but one by one, hashers caught me up. When Cuckold passed, I thought – surely not?! Not long back I remember passing him on hills – he could never make it to the top without stopping! Today it was more of a pause than a stop… Taste My Buns went past in a flurry as though I was the only one going uphill! Poo was gentler, but didn’t want to wait for me. There was a little down, before another up. I managed to jog down a little, and scrambled to the top before lying down at the top for a rest – the humidity! Tadpole past by and I managed to get back to my feet as Turkish got there. There was some downhill, and I managed to jog a little, Turkish ahead, Alice behind. Alice caught up by the OnIn, and we were both relieved to be alive. Back at the resort, we opted for the stairs to climb back up – attempting some small talk, but mostly reverting to the age old cave man panting for communication.

All in all, it was a great trail – a tough one for sure, some great mentally challenging checks early on, and physically challenging later.

Alice:- Strawberry Fields Forever.

Picture a run
Across the spurs
On a hillside,
With 2 tangerine runners
And clear Samoeng skies.
Somebody calls you
You answer quite slowly
The girl with false trail in her eyes…

Blimey, these girls are setting the bar pretty high. Monday hares are on a hiding to nothing and Cuckold gives himself enough hidings as it is.

Knockout and Sex Pistolet combined for a scenic, challenging and varied run from the Strawberry Farm down Samoeng Rd. Thick white strips marked the trail, sometimes bent double but well sited – and well sighted. Checks were strips stapled together and obvious. That’s more than can be said about some of the On trails which were cunning if not difficult in places.
The trail curved a path down the spurs and thru some orchards then up and around with some stunning open vistas to enjoy on the return. Two Thai guys attracted by KO while setting joined us and really got into the spirit and ran well, especially Mr Happy!
I ran where I could and walked when I couldn’t and managed to keep up with Turkish and Blows Herself most of the run. Turkish grabbed the back of a flatbed SUV to pull himself up the worst gradient after I tried to work out if I could somehow catch and vault the tailgate.
After the steep section towards the end, I almost caught Byte my Yahoo who started jogging again as he sensed me approaching. I forebare to overtake after the On In narrowly saving the good Dr from the ignominy of a marriage proposal when he shouted On In. I was that happy to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I was running on empty energy wise, although still had some water left.
We climbed the steep stairs to get back to the A, the thought of the winding, steep longer path didn’t appeal.
Top run, nice company, kind weather, fun circle, OnOn. And mental note not to fly with Poo after Chucky’s narrative to close the circle.