Category Archives: CSH3 – Saturday

Chiang Mai Saturday Hash is a mixed hash which meets every Saturday.

17th March – CSH3 – Alice & Co.

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Rating: 9.0/10 (1 vote cast)

The Shorcutter Special

So here we were back at the start of the last Ballbreaker. The hare not content to put us through the wringer once, decided, with m-alice aforethought to make us re-visit our fears by running
most parts of it back to front a second time. In an upside downy sort of way. Is there any other, you ask. The Brown man took off as usual in his “It’s not a race” guise pounding the trail followed by a band of semi enthusiastic runners up. I passed Shagless in a futile attempt to stay in touch with the pack, only to find him shift a gear and pass me effortlessly on one of his impulsive sprints. But like a sparkler, his fizz of energy was short lived and the proper order of things returned.

We were soon in the canyon-ish area and here the beastliness began. The trail was abandoned by all and sundry, everyone had a different idea where the trail should go. Who needs paper anyway? The melee was brought to an end when a lone frb called the On. From all points of the compass our Motely gang took various routes to by-pass, shortcut, overtake any and everyone they could. Eventually some sense, though not much, of order returned. Graven who had been lurking at the back of the pack, in that dream-like state he occasionally lapses into, now leapt into life. Approaching the head of the pack from a 90 degree direction he took off in pursuit of Chuckie and the Brown man. This would be a hard group to catch. The next circle check seemed to suggest that we bear left away from the little shack with its narrow path across a small stream. I clocked it and remembered it from the ballbreaker. TMB confirmed it and we took off to check. Tasty went left and I went up the hill. There Is a god. I was on. Yes, I did call it and followed trail which initially lead left to a False trail. Bastard ! 180 degrees behind us the trail continued. Up the hill we trudged only to find the bulk of the pack had found a shortcut and were now ahead. Isn’t that a great feeling to think you put All that effort in. From there it was a bit of a blur of dastardly V checks and circle checks most of which Sloppy checked, manfully, confidently, and Yes, of course wrongly.

We were met by the stranest leprechaun of a hare at an ad hoc beer stop. Well more of a beer halt really. It wasn’t actually beer, more a gloopy green syrup concoction that was best avoided suspiciously. Yet another first class opportunity for the SH brigade to do their thang and whizz promptly on by. Onwards. Once more into the…..dustbowl of eternity as fine powdery dust did to our lungs that which hitherto, the polluted air had failed. Choked us, filled our eyes with fine granules of sand. But we Hashers are made of better stuff and would not be defeated. Well, we would If we had a choice. We didn’t.

The onslaught continued with the front group being split up for short distances only to regroup soon after. Unexpectedly Sex Pistol and I found trail, Sloppy soon joined us and together we 3, we dumb 3 followed trail, descending into St Patrick's very own Irish bog of a cowfield. We were in deep sh*t and Piss. A watery Piss which filled up our shoes. Devine. To impress us in our misery the smart shortcutting b’stards simply sloped past us, along an off trail track. We arrived at the A site like the carriages of a train pulled in too fast and ram shackled bodies littered the area. Nice one Alice. Aided and abetted by Blows Herself & Cartoon..

10th March – CSH3 – Sloppy Rod

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Rating: 8.0/10 (3 votes cast)

Well, that was an adventure! The runsite is rarely used, because while it isn’t far from town, navigating to it isn’t straight forward. The hare wasn’t sure what the best way of directing people was, and I among others ignored the hash signs, and just made my way to the lake – one of the ones between Maejo and Doi Saket. It took just 20 minutes to get there (closer than Mae Hia!) It took others much longer to get there, and Chuckie was notably late, arriving as we set off.

Thankfully the runstart will move back next week, as it is getting a tad warm when we set off. Brownie virtually sprinted out of the blocks, only to remember he was carrying his bike key and turn back. I had jogged off after him, so I kept jogging from the start. A nice trail looping around the mountain, with the lake on our left. After some way we got our first circle – placed down a drop off in a quarry area to the left. Having scouted around here before, it was a split – either we’d turn left and head up the hill or head out to the lower ground… I’ve been around the lake and up the hill before, and it isn’t a great run, so I headed out the gully. Sure enough I spotted powder beneath me, so carried on parallel as Tasty made the call.

Another check, and this time I got it wrong, thinking the hare wouldn’t turn straight back towards the A. I wasn’t far behind a pack lead by Strangely Anal, but it soon became clear the hare intended to let the runners run, and not let them be distracted by things like checks! Geez! Overall it was a great running route, but it needed more checks to keep the pack together!

We got to a Cross Check, but with Brownie coming back from straight, and Strangely Anal off to the right, nobody bothered with left. I kicked it out and set off after the FRB pack. The pace was fast for the hash (5km in 34mins!). We past so many good check opportunities, with trail just carrying on. There would be no way of bringing this pack back together.

I caught up at a check by a canal, and nobody had checked the option back to the left. That seemed most likely to me, as right took us back towards the A. I was looking for powder on the right of the road and nearly gave up, until I spotted something on the left. I may have missed the first blobs, but suddenly I was ahead. Chuckie, Brownie and Graven were all in pursuit, so I just kept pressing on – we were on a trail I set around 7-8 years back (one of my first ever solo haring sets), but I was guessing most of the pack would have been disoriented by now. Again, we were lacking checks – it was just a runners run.

Chuckie was keeping close watch behind me, but another cross check slowed Brownie and Graven. Suddenly Graven appeared on the road to our left – very intrigued to know how he suddenly appeared there – Strava doesn’t lie! I don’t think he could have short cut, as he was very close to the trail at the end of the run. The pace was too much for me, but I was pushed on by the steps behind me. Finally a check, but it was put just after a junction, so when we turned back, GI and CW were slight ahead, and both charged off down the most obvious trail (well, GI did, and CW loitered). I picked a smaller trail that looked to head more in the direction I was expecting, and sure enough there was paper again.

I was leading again, but very soon CW and Brownie closed me down. I was overheating, struggling to focus on keeping moving forwards, while CW and Brownie were just having a chat behind me about who was who’s hero. I can barely breathe, but these guys are acting as though we were sat around a table. I made it to the check ahead of them and turned hard right. CW headed up the hill, while Brownie followed me. Nothing… Nada… And then a call from CW up to my left. I had a choice, and I made it. Brownie turned back, I carried on, paralleling as I could see CW up to my left. Sure enough I soon ran into a Check Back.

I hiked my way up the side of the dam – knowing it was the wrong dam, and we still had someways to go. I suspect quite a few thought they might have been home when they saw that dam! I nearly collapsed before reaching the top, and paused for a while wretching. When I got to the road along the dam wall, with the sun beating down, I staggered along walking. As Chuckie and Brownie caught me they commented on my honour for waiting for them – I wasn’t waiting, I was close to passing out…

When I got the next check wrong, it was game over. I was out of water and on my own, paying the price for the early pace. When I finally crawled my way into the A bucket, I wasn’t feeling good… It took some time before I could face a beer. It isn’t even hot season yet!

A shortish circle full of braindeadedness, before the attempt to escape the runsite. I lead a convoy of vehicles out by the most direct, but difficult to navigate route. I stuck at around 40-50kmph, with hazard lights flashing, and constantly a stream of headlights behind. It didn’t work, and somewhere along the way we lost half the convoy, with Burritto Butt leading them first towards Maejo, then back to the runsite, and finally out to Doi Saket!!!

Somehow they still managed to get their food before I did, so that is another restaurant that I will not go back to!

3rd March – CSH3 – Pussy Whisperer & ABB

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Rating: 8.8/10 (4 votes cast)

We were promised a full moon, so it would be a night run. I’m all for something different so drove for an hour or so to the southern end of canal road to see what they had in store for us. We were set off into the night, with most of us carrying torches – I carried 2, but some forgot and didn’t ask to borrow one! At the first check, Turkish and KO checked to the right, for what seemed like an eternity – it turned out neither had a torch with them.

I turned back slowly and walked for a while, getting used to the darkness, slowly overtaking the walkers. I started jogging, but it took a while to get back to the pack. There were some checks, but the hares were clearly being kind to the pack, making sure the trail was clearly marked for the darkness. Finally I approached a group of torches huddled together, and it appeared they were still checking. I’d just passed a small trail off to the right, so headed over to it, and suddenly I was at the front of the pack! I pushed myself into a steady jog, and got the next check right as well.

At the next there was utter confusion. It was called, but then Graven suggested we were just going back the way we’d come. It was dark, so none of us were really sure what was going on, particularly when paper ran out not long later. Perhaps we missed a check? Suddenly there were calls from everywhere, and everyone was convinced they were correctly on trail. I suspect that TMB & I were the only 2 that did it all, and strava suggests others cut a loop out.

For me, I was on my own again, believing I was just following TMB… I was expecting someone to catch me up sooner or later, but nobody appeared from behind. When I got to a check that was kicked out, I was really confused… Either TMB came back to kick it out for me, or… am I doing a 2nd lap of the trail? I tried to focus my brain, but it was dark, and I could have been on any trail. I trudged on, and was shocked to find all the pack already home when I got back.

Devious, particularly hiding the moon until the circle was nearly over!

24th Feb – CSH3 – Geisha Gash & Doesn’t Get It Outstation

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Rating: 4.5/10 (2 votes cast)

I drove up to Chiang Dao for the weekend’s festivities beginning with Friday night. Good times to catch up with old friends, and make some new ones… The run itself was early – we set off in the back of pickups and songthaews at 2:30, with the sun beating down on us, as we were dropped in the middle of nowhere. This would be all new.

I don’t know how many hares it took to set this run, but Boom Boom Baby and Citrus Smeller were on fire for the first few checks – it wasn’t until later we discovered they had helped set that part of the run! I on the other hand was getting everything wrong. An interesting twist to the run was that (allegedly) there were secret eggs hidden close to some of the circle checks, which meant each time we got to a check, people started hunting right around the check, rather than checking properly. This confused the hell out of me, as I had forgotten the harebrief by then. Instead, I just couldn’t hear any “ON” calls because of the sound of rustling leaves…

I was doing a good job of getting everything wrong, and slowly overheating. Somehow I was still near the front, and finally got one right as we crossed an unlikely little stream much to the enjoyment of a local chicken farmer. I got a couple right in a row, and now being at the front, I had a look for eggs – no luck for me! CW got to a check just behind me, and he agreed left was the likely option – I went left, while he went straight. After 120m or so, I paused and turned around, but there were no other calls. I edged out to around 150m, but still nothing. When I looked back now, I saw Shagless coming in my direction. Aha! Inside information! I went another hundred, but still no paper. I asked an old lady sat chuckling by the side of the road, and she told me the paper was further on. After 300m or so from the circle, I finally found paper! Either someone had pulled paper down, or the hares had been too busy yacking!

The next couple of checks were straight on, but each time, it was closer to 200m than 100m… Another circle, so I checked a full 200m, finding nothing. When Shagless (co-co-lead-hare) called it from 300m in a completely different direction, I was half a k off the pace. I decided to gamble as the trail I was on appeared to be bending in the right direction anyway… Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, this time I lost. With the sun burning down on me, it took me some time to loop around, and by the time I found a check, it was kicked out and the pack long gone. I jogged and walked, and finally caught up with 4 lovely young ladies, who were also struggling with the heat. I was tempted to stay with them, but pressed on. Finally I heard voices ahead – with trail going to the right, there were clearly people calling straight on. I did the sensible thing and went straight, hooking up back with the front of the pack, joining them as we headed down a steep bank to the beerstop. I sat in the shade at the back of the songthaew, and the heat hit me… BAM!

I was struggling to focus on anything. By the time I was half way through my beer they were packing up the beerstop, and heading back. I opted to get the breeze on me sitting in the back of the pick up, so missed out on the epic Chuck Wao river crossing just before the end. Saturday night seemed a lot quieter than Friday had been, so most people made it out for the hangover amble.

All in all, a very successful outstation – great job hares!

10th Feb – CSH3 – Taste My Buns

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Rating: 6.4/10 (5 votes cast)

Tasty teamed with Foxy and engineered a set up which relied on hashers not being halfminds. The harebrief detailed precise distances for a myriad of choices between 2.something and 10k. Clearly a lot of work had gone into setting it up! After 5 minutes of harebrief, I’m not sure I knew what was going on, but for sure it sounded like we should be following white paper on the longer run.

We set off back around the lake, and didn’t see anything until a blob of powder and then a circle in powder. I checked over the road and found a nice looking trail between a couple of quarries. Emmaroid was following and when we found some powder we were confused. Emmaroid picked some up and sniffed it like a DEA agent. Unconvinced we didn’t call for quite a while – he ran on another 100m or so to find some paper, so the pack were someway back, and confused, from the start. It didn’t take long for them to catch up though as the 2nd check must have been nearly 200m before powder. I’d checked the right way first, but gave up after 150m or so. When it was eventually called nobody was quite sure where we were supposed to go, but we grouped up heading along the side of a canal.

A split gave walkers the option of following pink paper, while for the runners it was also a check. One of the problems of doing Wimp/Rambos is that it takes out a check opportunity, but here the hares had creatively combined a split with a circle check. Most understood what was supposed to happen, but there were a few stood around confused. Next was the family of cows that really didn’t appreciate being tied up on a narrow path with a bunch of crazy colourful hashers running at them. They were terrifiedly spooked when I passed, so I hope the rest made it through.

Another check crossed the canal and Sloppy found trail over a concrete weir that needed good balance. Not having it I went around and rejoined the pack at the next check, which for some reason took us out into the rice paddies. I felt bad enough trampling on the poor farmers field, but worse when he came out to find out why the hell a crazy bunch of foreigners had suddenly decided to destroy his crop. Not good. I think Sloppy was conscientious enough to go back and all the way around to avoid causing more damage. Sticking a circle check in the middle of a rice field and expecting hashers to scatter everywhere?!

I was happy to finally be out of the ricefield, and we got to a circle where the run imploded. Nobody imagined we should go back into the ricefield and destroy more of it! Everybody was relieved to be out of the field and checked each way along the road – even running on road would be better! With everywhere being checked thoroughly (except back into the rice field), Graven and I spotted something white across another field closer to the hills and headed off to investigate. It was white, it was paper, but it wasn’t hash paper. We were a long way from the circle, but still nobody had called it. We headed along the trail to the right and spotted Turkish beelining across the field with intent, saying nothing. It was trademark Turkey silent running, so we headed to intercept getting to a circle 40m behind him as he called “CIRCLE CHECK!!!”.

It took some time to understand from Turkey that he hadn’t been on paper, he’d just seen the check from a long way away. And by the time we figured out we had got to the check from the wrong place, the pack was already headed our way. It didn’t take long to solve, so I found myself at the front running back along the bottom of the hill on a nice pleasant trail, unaware of how much of the trail we had skipped.

A couple of checks later I stumbled on the hares at a warm beer stop. Warm beer and a cross check. I managed to find 2 false trails, including one at the top of a nasty steep cliff climb. Ack, I should have just had a warm beer instead! I cut across and rejoined Graven when we got to yet another choice. We could do the wimp trail which by now was surely already kicked out, or we could stick with white paper and head on in to the cold beer. It didn’t take too much thinking!

My head is still trying to get its way around the complexities of the run, or perhaps it is just trying to recover from a night out with Belly Dancer..!

27th Jan – CSH3 – HRA

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Rating: 9.3/10 (3 votes cast)

HRA and female mystery co-hare and chauffeur got busy in Nam Phrae to eek out a devious route from well known terrain and trails.
Two songthaos, the Sat local mob, a couple of visitors and numbers were rocking. We were on powder with small x papers where powder wasn’t suitable, and trail was clearly marked all the way around. That was good. Also good was seeing so many in their colourful BB 2018 t shirts. Even Sups bought the last XXL!
I was sure we’d take an early left as HRA had mentioned hills but no, he teased us and tormented us, and we took the second road in towards the doi and 333 shooting gallery behind the Grand Canyon.
Alice knows almost every step of these hills and forests but HRA put his run together in a unexpected and clever way, especially early on, thus the lead was ever changing and the pack well grouped. Early calls from Emme Royde and Cartoon didn’t pass muster so Sex Pistol nailed them later.
Heading up towards the hillside shelter, we abruptly went right at what seemed to be a dirty check and H took us down the ravine of hell, the ravine that fcuked over shortcutters Skidmark, Doggie and possibly Turkish in about 2011 when I set here. It was not passable then but has a way down now and a makeshift handrail and ramp going up. That’s progress! It also has a few pitfalls. Alice found one and Anyone called out Take care! after my fall. Helpful! Does Nothing went down here too and observers said it sounded like a giant wind bag being deflated.
Once in the hills, we took the left fork up and peeled around to the left in a wide loop heading home. I was going ok and keeping up. Knockout and Cameltoe ran hard up the steep bits. Browny, Tasty Poo, Cartoon and Pussy were all there and thereabouts. Chucky was back in new trainers and wasn’t his usual supercharged roo self. Coming out of the forest trail went right and messed up Emma Royde and others. A clever circle and unexpected cut through a coffee shop property put me third and took out FRBs who’d streamed down the hill. Frozen appeared like a UFO from nowhere striding out of some property. Tasty nailed the next as I followed her but I got the last couple dead on despite hating myself for having to check what I thought were obvious wrong ways as Tasty got to choose the likely way at the penultimate and I was running into a new barb wire fence at the last. But no, the hare had found a way to go through one fence and around the last. I pushed hard the last 800m and passed Sups, Superbitch and Cockatoo on the run in. HRA and Analvice looked fairly incredulous as I steamed home to garlands of glory and the crowd’s adulation. Well, a bottle of water, a can of Leo and a down down for being the ugliest care assistant for changing old men’s shirts.
Top set, good crowd, OnOnOn at Kwan’s Kitchen. Well played HRA.

20th Jan – CSH3 – Graven Image

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Rating: 9.0/10 (2 votes cast)

It seems more hares have been realising how great the running is in Maejo – lets get away from the dull canal road and explore the north! Graven picked the runsite up by the lake, but was then trapped even further by the terrain and trying to avoid the trails of recent runs. The hare brief gave it away – if you want to avoid the hill wait behind, otherwise, off up the hill… I led the way, on a few bits of powder… With Angry Inch just behind, I powered on through with a few questions of are you on? We’d missed it but Graven had put a circle check right at the start of the run!!! WTF?! Graven? Of all people? The echoes of Graven’s haring lectures reverberated around my mind… Checks are to bring people back together, not split them up!

I continued up and of course was back on powder as we’d been told we were going up the hill. Another couple of checks and Brown Finger was following me close at each check – could you not even pretend to check somewhere else? The main trail at the top offers a 50/50 split, left or right, but there was no way Graven was going right. I went left and carried on tagging the early checks. Brownie caught up and breezed by, only to wait for help at the next check. Apparently he had inside information about where not to check… It was straight again, but finally I got the next one wrong. I picked straight along the nice running trail and when I was wrong, I looped around to the left, but by the time I rejoined trail, most of the pack had already past by silently – even solving a FT!

The descent for a while was rocky, and my knee was dodgy, so I lost a bit of ground, only then to meet up with some walkers. Damnit – 3 checks or so that were already kicked out, and the pace was quick. Graven ran along with us giving a running commentary of how well the run was going. It felt crowded – I love running these trails though, and the walkers were excellent at keeping to the side and letting us run past. Some months back I’d figured out a deceiving little loop, and for some reason I was convinced Graven would do the same… and I was wrong… and I was thirsty… We crossed the road, and Graven was there to give the option of a Walker route back to the beer, so I took it!

13th Jan – CSH3 – Foxy & Robin Banks

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Rating: 7.0/10 (2 votes cast)

Foxy teamed up with Robin Banks at Huay Tung Thao. It’s been a while since we’ve run here as a hash, but my recent explorations have told me that some old trails have become overgrown, and many of the good old trails are just unusable – when I saw the directions, I hoped the hares had scouted before they’d decided where to set! I wasn’t the only one struggling to find the A-site due to poor signage.

An early harebrief and we were set off before some of the pack had found the A. The A-site wasn’t new, but with changes in the mud tracks, we got to it a different way – it was the familiar trail cutting down to the bottom of the ugly waterfall. A big arrow pointing left, and a vocal co-hare insisting that we should turn left! It was clearly going to be right – first up, the hares had posted on facebook their scouting pics, secondly the trail to the left once upon a time was nice, but today runs out into overgrowth. The other option was the waterfall, which frankly is a bad, bad, bad idea. A V check took us towards the waterfall, with the co-hare guarding anyone from doing the obvious turn to the right. I guess I’ll play the game for now, and climbed up the side of the waterfall for a bit, before obviously going back down and along the trail at the bottom of the hill. The check had done nothing to keep the pack together, it had just scattered us.

We headed directly towards the aqueducts (I just spent some time to teach Terrorbyte and 8-Bit that the spelling of aqueduct is with an e not the sensible a as in aquaduct – we agree it is BS). After a W/R split, we made our way along the tiny canal, and when the trail when over the aqueducts, each time I dived underneath and managed to overtake a couple of hashers. But it was overgrown, and narrow, and my legs were weary. When the trail headed left back up the hill it was clear they were either going to double back to the wimp rambo split, or head further along the lake before coming back along the road. At 3k+ in I didn’t fancy either, so cut back down to the lake and trundled along the lake back to the W/R split. I got there and found how the hares had changed the trail, not long before the pack came down off the hill.

I jogged over the dam with Scooby Do and Brown Finger chasing me down behind. At the other end of the dam, a circle check, already kicked out, but not towards the village – this was going towards the main HTT entrance. I opted for the shorter route through the village, and bizarrely even though I made it clear I was short cutting, the pack followed me – to the point that the GM picked up the paper that was correctly laid out of the circle and relaying it in the wrong direction. I can only imagine the confusion behind, which surely contributed to Sticky Wicket arriving close to dark. Meanwhile I was leading a growing collection of FRBs on a shortcut through a MooBaan. The only problem was they wanted to go faster than me (they had just caught me up going over the dam!). They wanted to go faster, but they weren’t 100% sure which was the shortest way back, so had to keep stopping to wait for shortcutting instructions! When we finally got close enough there was a break for the finish, but Brownie stayed around to chat as we dragged our way in to the finish.

6th January – CH3 – Alice (Ball Breaker)

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Rating: 7.7/10 (3 votes cast)

Setting a ballbreaker isn’t easy – it takes a LOT of work, both in scouting and in managing logistics – it takes a deal of work to pull it off, and the hares pulled it off, so great job! I had 17.3km in around 3 hours, including 470m elevation gain. By the end I was happy to finish and have a beer.

The A-site was the Country Cabin near Doi Saket – a great little restaurant that I’ve many times sat reading a book and passing the afternoon away. We showed up, and waited for the rest to appear, listening attentively for any hints the hares might inadvertently give away. And boy were there hares!!! Alice, Blows Herself, Mr. Poo, Foxy Cleopatra, Burritto Butt, perhaps even Strangely Anal? How many cooks does it take to perfect the broth?

I know this area – it’s my backyard – I’d even made a prediction about which hill it would be – I was wrong… But when the songthaew dropped us off, I had a pretty good idea, and my heart sank just a little. We started off not far from Wangtarn Resort, heading towards the high mountains. Suckit must be close to 60 now, but I remember around his 50th we did a 50k from Wangtarn resort, and BF, GI and I pieced together a bit of a connection there. I was holding back trying to stick with my philosophy of staying with the front of the pack while putting in the minimal effort.

The trail came out onto the tarmac road, and for some insane reason hashers seemed to scatter down the hill? Angry Inch lead the way up the road, and I followed gingerly. Please not this hill, please not again, the nightmares are still coming… Sure enough Angry called ONON, and the ascent was on. We past the abandoned house where the Ballbreaker started 5 years ago, and from here the ascent is quite brutal. Gorf skipped by as though he hadn’t realised he was setting off on a Ball Breaker, under the impression he was just on a 5k park run. A V-Check, and for me turning left was a 0% chance – it might look tempting, but a sharp pain to my ribs reminds me of a fall I took in that dark gully. Memories were leading me up this hill – unlike most of the rest of the pack, I knew the torture of the climb, and I could also predict where the hare would let us free.

Gorf jogged up next to me like a freak of nature. Does he not appreciate that we are going up? A circle… Strange place for it, I only know one option to keep going. Gorf must have gone 98yards before giving up and dancing back. I could have encouraged him to check somewhere else, but I didn’t have the energy, so we carried on to the inevitable paper. Up to a little ridge, with a great view. The hares had even placed the paper to lead us to enjoy the view before heading back to the left of a hill. So far we were on the trail I’d set 5 years back with Shagless – I’d spent nearly 300km and many many hours all over this mountain. I was confident I knew every possibility, but the trail carried on following the way Shagless and I had set. Finally Gorf came running back and normalcy returned as we headed back down the hill – perhaps even more slowly that we’d gone up it.

I knew this trail was there, but for a bit I was on new ground, and while the descent was dodgy, when we hit the bottom there was a good check, and then some great running trails. A few more checks would have perhaps let the rest of the pack stay close, but there was a good pack of FRBs turning over the lead at the front. I was doing a good job of staying amongst them with little effort – such as when GI and I called a clear false trail off to the left, and got a head start along the main trail. We emerged into the valley where the dogs home is, and it was long before one of the FRBs disturbed them while checking a circle. Scooby Doo led us on true trail around the edge of the field, between the two small lakes and to a circle check. We’d been promised 7-8km on the first leg, and we were short of that – heading out to the road now couldn’t be right, so I helped Brownie check off to the left, while Sloppy lucked out to the right and out to the road. We could see the first beer stop waiting for us not far along the canal, and a race emerged in front of me for winning to the beerstop – I think Sloppy got it from his raised fist pumps. I walked in and as I was carrying my own water I carried on not wanting my legs to seize up…

The trail turned back to the mountains, and I edged along fully expecting a trick – perhaps a sneaky false trail? THe path leads to a gate which is always locked and impenetrable. Today it was locked, but the hares had found a way of getting past it – interesting! I walked along waiting for the pack to catch me. Perhaps they were enjoying the water / snacks, or probably the beer. Finally I got to a circle check, and somewhere behind I heard TMB calling “RU?” I had a very clear idea of where the trail was likely to go, and quickly called ONON. There was a fallen tree blocking the trail, which was a little confusing, and held the pack up a bit behind. I was excited about the next check though, as I really love the hidden trail off to the right – I can only imagine the hares excitement the first time they found it… As I approached the circle I heard someone calling checking from up ahead. That someone sounded a lot like Frozen Dick… And looked a lot like Frozen Dick when I got to him. No idea how long he’d been poking around for it, but I helped him out.

I like these trails – I’ve set them, but this was the first time I’ve been able to run them on a hash. “Run” is maybe not the right word, as it was a while before we could actually get running. The pace was pedestrian as we all were cagey about putting too much effort in. We emerged from the hill shoulder and down the trail. A circle check as Gorf caught me again. I carried on, and where once there was a small wooden house, today there was a bustling collection of wooden houses, a plethora of children, and a school of aggressive dogs. I got a stick to fend off the dogs… The kids were clearly on my side – friendly, happy, and much more aggressive when it came to hurling lumps of mud at the dogs. I had a chat with them about white paper. One pointed me in one direction, and then was scolded by his friends as they pointed me onwards. I knew I was more than 100m from the check, but there were a few strips of paper on the ground, and the evidence suggested paper had been torn down. I was on trail and bellowed ONON back, which surely Gorf heard otherwise that check might be difficult!

I carried on and sure enough at the next circle, Gorf wasn’t far behind. I turned right, confidently, and happy this time there were no bees. Of course we wouldn’t be going up the hill to the right, so as I had a bit of time, I found a nice stick to prepare myself for the next pack of dogs. Gorf caught me as we passed the trail off to the right – playing the percentages I was tempted to head that way, or at least as the ladies that were stood around, but as I was up front I did the decent thing and jogged(ish) to the FT. I turned back a lot quicker than Gorf and sure enough we were heading off back dangerously close towards where we’d been before.

Here the pack started passing me. There was a chance of another FT up front, and there was a way to cut down the field to the left, but nope. Further ahead there was a cross junction, and surely there we had to turn left – otherwise trail was getting close. Sloppy and I headed left, but finally Gorf called it straight on. Ugh. I had made a mistake. By now the FRB pack was well established, and sticking together as a group – sure we’d lost the walkers, but the checks were good enough to keep a sizable group together, and keep turning over the lead. I was slipping backwards though, but was surprised when Graven suddenly appeared, and passed me somewhat similar to Marvin in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.

We got back to the road, just 100m or so away from the first beer stop. This time I got a beer. I was still wary about stopping – as I write this, I am looking at my anti inflammatories, and hoping I can move my knee tomorrow! I kept on going and promptly got the circle check wrong. The 2nd beer stop was at a small shelter I’d set a male hash run from a couple of years back, and I set off on the way I’d set the run. Today we ended up in the same spot, but Alice used a nicer route to get there. I walked along, enjoying my beer.

Somehow I caught up again as they were spread out looking for a solution to a false trail. A big sign on the gate saying NO ENTRY (or something like that in Thai), was scaring people off. My mind drifted back to the day I spent 2+ hours trying to find a way to avoid this property, hitting deadend after deadend, before sneaking around the edge, only to meet the nicest, kindest English gentleman you could imagine. I had no qualms going through the gate, and happily waved at his wife today – seriously, this property is gorgeous, and the owner is a star. I didn’t see him today, but I recall him welcoming me onto his land in the past saying “We are but custodians of this land, you are very welcome to enjoy it!”. The traditional wooden houses are great, the land well maintained, and the walk across the grounds through the water buffalo and peacocks out to the ricefields is beautiful.

TMB and Brownie led the way along the trail through the ricefields, and we were starting to get to more familiar Alice area. He’d set runs here, and I remember him finding some connects to abandoned moobaans. I never switched out of minimal effort mode, just trying to plod along. Every time there was a slight incline my legs screamed at me. Every time there was a slight decline my legs screamed “NO!”. I was doing ok… I was comfortable… I was going to finish.

The pack rejoined to solve a false trail. There was an interesting shift in philosophy here… Normally when we have a problem to solve, we are fairly combative – we spread out as individuals, wanting to be the winner who solves it. By now, we were resigned, a team created by our group experience. Almost to the point of sitting down to discuss our options. We all checked one way down the road, then we all went another, discussing what might be possible, because most of us were reluctant to risk being badly wrong. I suspect in the end, paper was taken down and not left at all helpfully for those who followed. The collective exhaustion perhaps.

A bit later the front runners managed to run straight through a sharp left that just led to a false trail. They were clean away while a pack grew behind them. We had to be getting close to the end… I hadn’t seen NOYB since the start, so I was confident he wouldn’t catch me, so I was satisfied. Knock Out passed and I thought – no problem, I can be beaten by a girl (TMB didn’t count she was already ahead). Then Able Semen passed… – ok no problem, I guess I can be beaten by a kid – but he better be signed by a premier league club so I have a story to tell my grandkids!

Then all of a sudden we were all back together. A circle check, and the shortcutting FRBs were caught by the rest of us. Out of nowhere Graven darted down a hole in the hedge and called ONON. Graven and Sloppy had decided that one beer wasn’t enough at the beerstops, they should have at least 2. They had set off way behind everyone else. The drunkards could barely stagger their way along the edge of the quarry walls, and yet somehow they had catapulted themselves to the front. Although we all agreed it was way too wet, muddy, stinky, so we should just go down the road instead.

A few more steps, and we were at the canal, a short way further and we were back at the A.

Thanks hares for the efforts – right about now I need a long sleep…

30th Dec – CSH3 – Scooby Do

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Scooby teamed up with Do to set a very enjoyable and runnable trail from the dam side at SKP. The checks were clever enough to keep the pack well grouped throughout the run so Graven and Angry never got away.
I was feeling a bit tired so walked and jogged as we descended towards the water then up to the road and across into the forest. That first check took ages and the very last one messed us up. totally. Apparently it was the penultimate, but not for most of us.
A friendly little puppy ran all the way round with Obscene and our female visitor Sticky Sex Toy from HK honked most of the way around after a beer fed morning according to her Brit partner, the wondrously named Princess Cock Tosser. Lady herself blamed McD fries but it was a shame Dr Byte couldn’t have seen her in action.
That check. Well the pack looked everywhere, went back, went further, different hashers checked the same routes, confusion, frustration, irritation. Alice checked into an overgrown field with a narrow path but no paper – and kept yelling Checking! until hope evaporated but a big gap in a bar wire fence appeared and then the massive dam wall. By this time a stream of hashers were following him as the homing instinct proved irresistible.
Apparently a handful of the pack, Poo and ? actually found true trail and another check before appearing on the far end of the dam wall. Turkish just appeared. The Ottoman outlier reverting to type.
Lovely set, decent circle and even a couple of splashes for light fingered Libbers who praised KO but slaughtered Alice in Full Bahrain Black Hash regalia. Hasn’t anyone told him about cultural sensitivity?!