Category Archives: CSH3 – Saturday

KO teamed up with JC for todays run, having teased the rest of the male hashers that she may choose them to be her co-hare! Seriously though, thanks for stepping in and helping out when Foxy pulled a sicky (get well soon Foxy!).

On to the run. A couple of months back there was a hugely memorable run from the same runsite, by the same hare, where things went monumentally “not to plan”. Today was little different! We set off with some eager new virgins. I got the first check wrong, figuring we were heading to the temple – but a nice switcharoo for the first check had the trail headed for the narrow bamboo bridge. I don’t like that bridge at the best of times, much less at the back of a queue, so decided to head around and join the pack the other side. CW joined me.

As we jogged round we saw the OnIn, and followed trail backwards briefly until we met the pack checking a circle. Both CW & I thought, bloody hell this is close! So we tried to steer the checking away from the In-Trail. Across the quarry (the same quarry that had caused issues previously!). We spied paper up the hill through the gap in the quarry – it was too far, but a few of us headed up there. I was about 70m short when the OnOn call came from Turkey. From where I was I had a great view across the quarry, and could see they’d found the in-trail. Shit. Everyone with me turned back, but I knew the call was wrong, so after a short debate headed up to see the KO on the paper. I was right! I called, and waved my arms. Stood like a mad man on top of the quarry I could see the hashers unconvinced… They had Turkey called from one side, and me calling from the other… Who would you trust? Luckily, only Anal Vice followed Turkey, and the rest of the pack turned back to follow me!

Up over a small hill and down to the concrete wall. I got there with Brownie, and I was wrong heading straight on, while he got it correct to the left. THe problem was Anal Vice stood across the valley calling “ON ON – I’m On Paper HERE!”. I yelled back “You’re going the wrong way – it is over here!”. He called out “I’m On, You’re on Old Paper!”. This continued for sometime. He was sure of himself. I was correct. For everyone behind it sounded like a lot of OnOn calls in the wrong direction!

I didn’t hear Brownie call, but with a virgin we figured we were wrong and crossed down to rejoin the trail. It was heartbreaking going down a hill, knowing that I had to climb it again just around the corner… The likes of Graven chose a smarter route. I rejoined trail amongst the walkers, so cut a small corner to head up the hill and rejoin trail not far behind CW & BF. Ahead of them were some ferocious youngsters. This son of Robin Banks – who the hell is he? Where did he get his genes from? I can’t imagine RB ever moving like the boy wonder!

I figured I wouldn’t see the front of the pack again. I bumped into Turkey & AV – they were still thinking they were doing it right, while everyone else was wrong… wtf?! Bizarrely I got to a check with hashers scattered. NOYB was coming back up the hill from having checked down – it later transpired that he had found a circle kicked out up the hill – a circle kicked out by the backwards duo of AV & TD. It had confused the poor boy, and led to more confusion for everyone else. I finally found it the long way down the hill, and waited while the pack found their way down the right way. From there were jogged back in much the way I’d gone out. Utter, utter confusion! If only the GM had remembered to splash the hares…

Fly By

Toe Sucker teamed up with Square Rooter for a set out behind the Ag Center. Familiar area, but no doubt they would find a different set. I barely made it in time for the harebrief – there would be several wimp outs, and extra short cuts for walkers? What was in store?

We set off in a different direction, and I got the 2nd check wrong wanting to cut to the right. We have to go right to get to the usual trails…? The next check had us foxed for some time – even after it had been called. Finally Sloppy found it cutting back down the dried up river bed, but nobody could place his call, which meant we had to refind the check behind him. When I finally got it, somehow there was Brownie & Sloppy up ahead, and then we were in the midst of the walkers… Huh? Who holds the walkers back only to set them off to block a narrow trail in the middle of the FRBs??? I was feeling weak, tired and already giving up interest. Finally through the narrow part, and past most of the walkers, another check.

All number of hashers ahead of me, so I picked left towards the inevitable hill. Somewhere ahead Graven was checking. Nothing, so Turkey and I set off cross country towards the other trail that heads up the hill. Nothing. No calls, just silence and the sounds of crunching leaves. Meh. Back down the hill and the walkers were already moving towards the first of the Wimp Rambo splits. I got there with ABB, and there was no sound ahead – how far behind was I?

This was where the trail turned up, and after pressing for sometime I finally caught sight of NOYB ahead of me. I know where we were, but when I came out onto the main trail at the top – sure enough there was a circle, but instead of being kicked out, there were hashers scattered all over the place. How hard were these checks?? I didn’t have chance to catch my breath when it was called back down the hill to the right. I set off, but really wasn’t feeling good.

Down the hill, past by many hashers, and then another Walker / Runner split – The runners going back up the hill to the left, while the walkers headed towards home. I headed home, but still got the remaining 2 checks wrong spending time fiddling around figuring it out.

FlyBy

Brownie teamed up with Graven & Banks for another threesome, and this was a run that I really, really enjoyed. We know the trails around Maejo, and they are great hashing trails. We just don’t know which combination the hares will come up with.

Setting off I hit a few checks right, leading the way up the hill. After that there was a constant cycle of leaders as one by one the hares thwarted us. Chuckie took the lead, and promptly got the next check horrendously wrong… Piggee too the lead and sure enough he got the next one badly wrong. From the Tigers head we made our way down to the square lake, and around it. I got one wrong, but managed to cut my way back across to rejoin Sloppy as we found trail heading back towards the square lake – the trail turned right, and we chatted away discussing how certain we were that it was a false trail. Sure enough, we had to turn back.

Robin Banks out on trail was grinning smugly – of course you know the fucking way – you’re the hare ffs!

The trail meandered its way over to the road and a circle check there had everyone checking across the road – everyone except me. I zig zagged back into the woods and sure enough there was the paper! Ahead again, and this time I was confidently 200m+ ahead. I called and pressed on to a V check. Turned right, and after 100m or so I found a check back. Every bone in my body said, screw it – carry on, noone will know, just turn left up here and you’ll be back on trail in no time… Damn you strava!!! Strava is keeping me honest(ish)!

I turned back and carried on correctly. Somehow None of your Business got ahead. You have no idea how unpleasant a ride home is if NOYB manages to “win”, or get to the beer before me. It doesn’t matter if I was to be carried in on a stretcher he would still be there gloating. I won’t give him the pleasure easily. I pressed on, pushing until finally he got one wrong. Strava evidence proves that from there he gave up and just jogged home along the road…

I was up front with Turkey & Sloppy. We were almost certain we were right at one of the last checks. So sure that we checked the extra distance, and sure enough found paper. Sloppy went back to do the right thing, while Turkey & I continued intercepting NOYB & Chuckie at the camp. WTF? CW? Where had he been? Where did he come from?

I edged ahead as we past the OnIn, only to take a memorable tumble. So we walked up the road together. Chuckie, Turkey & I, all of whom had honourably found our way to the end. We’d met the hare’s challenge and survived. Jubilant and united. As I smiled to my left I caught a glance over my shoulder of NOYB running up the hill, a determined look in his eye. I have to stamp that out. Lets run it in boys and teach the young whippersnapper a lesson. While we still can…

Today’s Fly By

Relive the hash:- Fly By

With many of the men away at the male hash outstation, and most of the committee depleted, it was a different hash, but nonetheless successful. The hares had had problems with the military / forest rangers who had thrown them off the intended route behind the convention centre. Diddly Squat had been scouting every day for 2 weeks, notching up 150km of scouting for the run – he could not be more prepared, and yet a huge spanner was thrown in the works, when told “NO”. The whole of Doi Suthep is out of action for the next 2 months as they try to prevent forest fires. I admire the goal, but not sure how stopping a bunch of hashers running through it will have any impact.

With time running out before the hashers arrived, the hares moved to a standard loop at Huay Tung Thao. Nothing virgin, but enough confusing checks to keep the remaining FRBs busy, and avoiding the mountain to keep the military happy.

Knock Out was the hare, but strangely there was no sign of her at the runsite… The crowds were set to help celebrate her 3rd wedding anniversary, but it was a quiet Mr. Poo that took the songthaew to the runsite, supported by his dad. The run had been intended to be in the Ag. Center, but instead we huddled at the space at the back of the center.

Strava now has “Fly By” so I’ve just watched me vs Piggy on the hash – awesome!!!!

Anyway, we set off through the barbed wire fence, so Turkey and I dashed off to avoid having to queue. The clues we had (from Pee Poo) were that it was flat – which pretty much gives it away – there isn’t much you can put together flat between the hills and the Ag center. I wasn’t right with the first break to the right, but sooner or later we headed right on the great flat trails. Brownie was up front, until he felt the lure of the hills. I led for a while until going wrong, and inadvertently getting caught up with Turkish & Chuckie on a short cut, we jogged our way back in for the beers.

A nice friendly set, with a little bit of shiggy, but mostly great running trails. Shame the Ag Center is taking over the area with more barbed wire fences, and more restrictions on where we can run…

Relive the run:- http://labs.strava.com/flyby/viewer/#492511409?c=w5q6epu6&z=E&t=1MllU7&a=sSBbHU-kVx0iBGId

Epic weekend! Excellent job Turkish, really, really good! For many of us the hash began at the 19th hole and the Friday night wine & cheese went on and on… Sometime around 3, Sups suggested it would be better to get 2 beers from the fridge rather than 1 as it would save time and effort later. Always keen on efficiency it seemed to make a lot of sense…. On Saturday it made much sense, when I woke mid afternoon feeling like shit and needing to scout a hangover run before the main run. Aaaargh!

I dozed through the harebrief, and was tempted to spend another hour lying in the shade behind a truck. Better to sweat it out I guess. I walked up the road, and eventually persuaded myself to break into a jog. The first circle was right by the waterfall – cunningly designed to stop anyone hearing the “On-Call” no matter how loudly it was called. Inside information let me pass most of the pack and follow Brownie & Poo to the left and then up the hill.

We headed over to climb up the waterfall, and I controlled my pace to keep my hangover under control. One by one I was passed by HRA, TMB, KO. Most suggested I took a Wimp trail. The trail was great – perhaps going at a slower than usual pace meant I appreciated it some more. Great views. Anal Vice breezed by giving me some encouragement, and Foxy approached me as I got to the Wimp Rambo split. Time to take the sensible option – I was already out of water and throat dry. Does Nothing soon came up behind on the Walker trail, but it wasn’t long before an arrow joined the trails back together – sadly it was pointing up and there was another climb to get through. Again nice trails, but no checks. From the top it was straight on down and back. Fortunately I had time to rehydrate a bit, take a shower and have a quick nap before the circle!

All in all a very successful outstation – good food, great trails, fun circle, and hangovers to prove it!

DGI teamed up with Diddly Squat (and Shagless?) for a run in the vicinity of Ob Kham. It was a new runsite for me, so this could be interesting. The songthaew was very late… very, very late! When the songthaew arrived there was a very indepth hare brief where each hare and co-hare took turns explaining how to deal with each of the checks. Thoroughly educated, it was nearly 30 mins after by the time we were finally released.

Within seconds of starting the run there was a V check. Turkey went left, and I was right. Another V check, and I wasn’t slowing down. The checks were thick and fast, but I was in the zone and lucking out on all of them. I got to the Wimp Rambo split, and that slowed me down – where was the R trail??? It took me a while to find powder randomly across the field – I could hear voices behind me again – “ONON!”. Another couple of circles and amazingly each time I nailed it. I was the lord of the hash, nothing would stop me! Just press on! Through a couple of barbed wire fences and a circle on the road. Of course it would be just to the left and the down that little trail – I was infallible! Only I wasn’t… And after 150m or so, there was no sign of paper. Damnit! I got back to the road as Brownie & co. approached the fence. Time to check another direction – surely right this time? I went surely 100m++ but no sign of paper – perhaps I missed the powder on the left? Who knows, I went back to the circle and followed a group in the opposite direction, but no call… OK, 4th option, into the field? Still no joy… Finally someone called from the way I checked 2nd time…. My bad, but I’d gone from being FRB hashgod, to mid pack.

Brownie was setting the pace ahead of me, so I locked into his tail and tried to press on – this was a fast paced hash today. We caught KO, and Brownie followed me checking to the left, before overtaking before the paper. We were off again, and Brownie was encouraging me to keep pressing on. A “V” check, and my choice. I went straight, and within moments regretted it. Sure enough there was the bar, and I joined Cool Balls & HRA following Brownie. A beer stop, but the walkers were already there. As we arrived Brownie was setting off again pausing only momentarily for a quick FU. I kept going with Brownie just about in eyesight ahead of me.

Sadly now all the checks were kicked out by the walkers. With W/R runs like that, its good news for the walkers, as they get to play the FRB game for once, but the checks are there to slow the FRBs down, the walkers don’t need to be slowed down! I ran on in – good fast running and a fun set. Whatever happened to birthday wings though?

Anything & Chilly Pussy – a haring partnership with history and reputation… Which hares would we get today? The kind friendly ones, or the evil ones? The songthaew was late so we would have to wait to find out. CMU graduation adds traffic to the roads, so Knock Out & Chuckie were even later setting off. Either way 10 mins or so late we set off, and Brownie urged me to run from the start.

The first check, a V-check, and I turned right towards the hills – before I got to the corner I saw the check back, and reluctantly chugged back to the main trail, and spent a while passing the pack. I caught up just in time for the next check – a circle. I got there with enough time to check almost straight on a promising trail. It looked so promising that I jogged off anticipating paper, only to be called back to the right. Ugh!

Again I was mid pack, busting a gut to get back into the midst. Finally I got some luck. The trail was clearly marked off to the left into a field, and hashers were heading in that direction, while Cuckold wasn’t convinced – he went straight and when I got there, he said, but there is paper here too…. 😀 False trail to the left, On on straight, lets run! Yup, I could see a circle check ahead, and this time it would be to the right. But the paper took me a while to find, but I headed up the hill with Brownie pounding along behind me. The next circle had the crafty FRB following me claiming he could see paper up ahead. I saw nothing, but sure enough we were right, and I was running at the front with Brownie.

He pushes me along… With an encouraging “Shall we run a bit here”, in response to my panting “this is up hill…” I know he could take off and run away from me, but politely he jogs along, toying with me! Had I not been at the front, I would probably have eased off, but the encouragement helped, and I pressed on. Finally a check – there could have been so many more checks, but at last we got one. I had outlasted BF, and got first pick. I chose left, and sure enough there was paper. I pressed on, and soon enough there was someone behind, this time it was Graven. Amicably encouraging me along again. OK, I know you could easily run past me!

I was doing what I could, but there just weren’t enough checks to mix things up, and sure enough Brownie was back panting behind us before we got to another check. A V check, and Graven did some strategic FRBing, following me up the “obvious” route, which turned out to be correct, and leaving poor Brownie to check off to the left. We couldn’t call on, and as we climbed the ridge, it seemed as though it was just the two of us broken from the front. We hit the ridgeline, and no check… Ack! Graven, politely running on my tail, dodging the trees that I uprooted and tore down. I need a check… please give me a check…! Graven thought there was a check, but instead it was just a larger piece of paper… Where were the checks??? Finally we got a circle check – it turned out to be the last check, and for me a 50/50.

My choice, I picked right, leaving Graven the steep downhill to the left. I jogged along, and… meh… nothing… Not looking good, but silence from behind (over and ridge into a gully, it is unlikely that voices would carry far. And then there was paper! and another bit of paper! But hashers just to my right chatting as they walked up the hill. This wasn’t the right paper, this was definitely wrong – the hares had left it by mistake when they changed their trail… I wasn’t going to call, but by now I was at the bottom of the hill. I figured I’d jog around the hill rather than climb back over it, and all the FRBs were home by the time I got there! Still a great run, it just could have done with a few more checks!

There had been complaints on Facebook, rumours of people not coming! “Mae Jo is too far away!” people cried. In the vent we had a record turnout, with two buses and loads of cars. There were also a bunch of visitors including lots of young people: Baby Shitter’s son Naa, American virgins and Irish and Australian visitors! The young people started off in front, full of energy, but soon fell back once the checks came. Mr Poo was ahead for a long time as he was able to guess where the twisted mind of Dr Byte might take us, but then a cunning placed circle check let everyone else in front and it was all up for grabs.

The beautiful trails near Phapat’s farm had been turned into dirt roads but the hares had still found some nice places to go. We reached the top of a ridge and FRBs headed out in all directions. Brownfinger set off to the left but the trail was to the right. Cuckold came charging down the hill with Naa in tow and took the lead just as everyone else noticed there was no powder. Reluctantly the two made their way back, arriving just in time for the discovery of the circle check so that they could make an about turn and head back to find the trail.

Soon after this walkers started appearing on the trail. Pamela had graced us with his presence, as had many harriettes. As the pack sped past them the hare appeared on trail, happily chatting with some of the walkers. Pigshit set off up the hill and to the right, but Graven knew what he was doing and found the trail to the left. Then there was a check and confusion reigned as hashers scattered to look for powder. Finally someone found it off to the left and we were off but by this time everyone was together. Runners set off down the hill, with Knockout and Seamen Soars speeding up to overtake some of the front runners. Another long circle check (there had been a few – all blamed on Diddly Squat’s long stories) screwed up the front runners again as they lost faith and came back up to look for true trail. However it went down and soon we found the last check.

None of Your Business was the one to find this (Pigshit having stopped 2 metres before) and set off at top speed. Hotly pursued by Turkish Delight, who had just realised that he would be able to come from nowhere to come in first if he tried hard enough they raced for the On In. NOYB put in the extra effort that would lead to him puking his guts out later on and ‘won’ the hash! Several of the new girls then went on to overtake Turkey as he gave up and staggered back to the circle.

Graven stepped up to set the run a week earlier than planned. Previously he’d set a run from the lake at the Tigers Head with Brown Finger – which had ended with runners in the dark and an emergency evacuation for BF. This time they took extra backup with Robin Banks as Chauffeur. 3 hares – what could go wrong?

BF looked nervous and promptly ran off with powder bottles in hand. RB was furiously smoking away. GI looked confident and pointed us off across the dam at the end of the hare brief. At the end of the dam was the “ONIN” – apparently it’s been there for months! Not our OnIn, but a circle check at the end of the dam. Piggy alongside me said “I guess we are going around the lake”, go for it I thought, no chance as I headed down the hill towards inevitable powder. Another check, straight on for sure. A third circle, and my gut thought back and the scramble across to the right – we’ve done that before. But this time I went straight and as most people followed me, we had to wait a while for Knock Out to call us to where my instincts said check. By the time I got back to the ditch scramble we were in a traffic jam.

Onto a trail, and the checks were straight, straight, straight. I slowly picked hashers off as they chose to check to the left or right. Finally when I hit the front and hit a check, it turned out to be to the right. I of course checked straight, followed by a bunch of hashers, who had to wait for Knock Out to again call us over through a garden to cross the road. A late arriving Sups was driving past us waving like a queen as we crossed the road into the traditional Maejo trails.

We climbed a bit with the pace moving along swiftly. It seemed like Poo was in front for a long time. I finally got back towards the front of the pack, and every time I got to a check there was Able Semen stood, paper in hand, grin across his face, and then the call came from Poo. Damnit – he was nailing everything! Several times I would have checked right, but fortunately didn’t need to as Poo was cruising away at the front… All the way till he hit a sneaky false trail!

I heard a FT call, paused momentarily with Scooby Doo and both headed right up a trail with absolute confidence. Sure enough there was powder, and then Scoobs hit a gear I’ve never seen him use before. It was uphill, and I was pushing along trying to stay ahead of Pigshit and Able Semen, but Scoobs reacted like he’s just got back from a stay at some dodgy Russian training camp, or like he hit a mario carts boost. Piggy, HRA, Able Semen & I pursued, and we found a V check. I’m not sure why it was a V and not a circle – the trail to the right looked like a possibility, but left was not likely. Scooby checked straight on, so HRA & I paused so Able Semen got there 2nd and we gave him the guilt treatment to make sure he checked left, while the rest of us carried on up the hill after Scoobs. Piggy turned back for some reason when Able called the rest of the pack on to the left. Muahahaha… On On Up!

A circle ahead, and Scooby chose left. I felt a moment of inner peace. Very recently these same hares had foxed me at that very junction. You weren’t going to fox me again! I darted across to the right to intercept trail ahead of HRA and accelerated. HRA was close on my tail, but I just had to hold him off to the 5 junction, and he voiced his disappointment when I got to the circle at the 5 junction ahead of him. It was safe running home from there, I just had to keep turning it over.

Another check off to the left, but a no brainer, straight on out towards the Tiger Head. Another circle, just after the trail to the left. They took us on that trail to the left last time, surely not again? OK, I confess, I went back and took the trail on the left up to the assault course – I heard HRA call on from the main trail to the right, kept going and intercepted trail at the obstacles. OnIn! Excellent run – thanks guys! And yes, I am happy I missed out on the rope bridge finale you had in store!