Category Archives: CH3 – Write Ups

24th July – CH3 – Does Nothing

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Today’s run had all the ingredients needed for a positive write up! First up – it was in Maejo – a hasher’s playground! Second, I got the wings – quite deservedly! I’d missed Saturday’s run, by the same hare in the same place, but I had taken a look at strava to see what people had got up to.

At the appointed time we were set off across the dam, and I jogged off towards where the ONIN had been on Saturday. At the end of the dam, the trail turned right down the hill, and I glanced over my shoulder and saw that nobody else had got going – Belly Dancer was leading the walkers across the dam. The road went down the hill and I thought, screw this, I’m off! I upped my pace and guessed the trail would be Saturday’s trail in reverse. It was – 100%. The thing that surprised me the most was that it caught out Sheep Shagger & Alice who had been on Saturday’s run!

Down off the hill and straight on around the hill on pure running trail – the trail was pulling me forwards, joyous, I love these trails. When I drove in I’d seen the paper crossing the road, but of course I didn’t know if it was leftover from Saturday. I couldn’t be certain, but it was looking pretty sure it would be a reverse of Saturday. I simply ignored the false trails, and followed the map in my mind, and sure enough the paper kept appearing as though my glasses were augmenting my trail. I was pushing the pace alone, and when a bug flew in my mouth I paused to wretch for a while. It had been mostly downhill so far, so I still had to go back up the hill.

I slowed down, and crossed the weir, crossed the road. I wasn’t kicking out checks – how could I? I stopped calling – I was alone in the jungle, at what point does it become weird? Over the road and I saw trail leading to the left, but it had to be right – I remember Saturday’s trail hugged the road. I went right, but nothing for 80m or so. I went back and then spotted the circle. Damnit! Just about my only mistake. From there it was pretty much straight back. Several time the markings went off to the left, to false trails, but I kept on true trail.

Really great trail, nice route to run. There are so many great trails around, lets use them!

Fly By:-

17th July – CH3 – Alice

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(Courtesy of Belly Dancer)

[Ed – For those of you who remember Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy, read this as though ‘Marvin’ – the robot with a brain the size of a planet – aka BMY – was writing]

I headed out of the office, tired, uninspired yet again to infernal Ob Khan Road on the outer rim of my hashing territory – yet another run set by those Canal Road lazy …..

Already wishing I’d headed home with 3 cases of Leo – I arrived at a decrepit moo baan instantly familiar where the rest of the motley male hashers arriving in somber mood – except Chuck Wao who was like a little girl excitedly looking forward to escaping to Cambodia the following day.

Returners Missing Link and Musk Rat swelled the ranks to 13 – hummm – lucky?
The rains were already tumbling as TMB – erm Alice gave his Hare Brief – only a teacher would dip his strips in blue ink!

On out and Belly made it the paper first – only to give up at an (unmarked) electric fence – Kwazi and Turkish spooked a barn load of cattle into a stampede – while everyone was getting their balls zapped on the electric fence!

The checks were nearly impossible to see (washed out) and ABB (RA) inclined the rain Gods to send even heavier rain. Of course for me every trail here is etched into my cranium and checks – if set suitably so I can out guess the hare and remain 1st are desirable, so a foul day like his – not wholly necessary.

It rained the entire run – so no need to bore you any further – Chuck Wao managed to keep 3 paces ahead of Sheepshagger (Wings) to win. Frozen led the Turk, Missing Link and Belly for some lum yai harvesting and GM Does Nothing led a good circle.

Why did I bother?

“Why should I want to make anything up? Life’s bad enough as it is without wanting to invent any more of it.” –Marvin

10th July – CH3 – Belly Dancer

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Belly Dancer teamed up with Krap Thai out at Baan Pong Resort – a place that has had so many good and bad runs! At 3:45 Sloppy called me and we decided to head out to see what BD had in store. Traffic was heavy, but we got there just in time for the harebrief, and that is probably about as much as I am qualified to comment on – I really don’t know much about the real run!

The harebrief ended and the run began with a circle check. Cue Graven Image – the checks are to bring the pack together, if you put a check at the start it only spreads people about. I am inclined to agree, but was trying to get my phone synced up with GPS. I failed and I’d forgotten my watch. The obvious way to go would be out of the gate and left, which meant the real way was probably back over the bridge. I headed that way and finally Piggy called us On. I saw a few bits of paper before another circle. Stained Penis (?) a visitor from Myanmar was stood transfixed as though bewildered what to do. He had grabbed a handful of paper, but didn’t seem inclined to do any checking! I got here first so its my job to deal with the paper? WTF! No sir, it’s your job to go check!

He was wrong, as was I, but when Piggy called the trail back to the left headed towards the ricefield it seems whoever was at the circle thought it was me calling. I decided to run around the small lake to catch up with Piggy, and inadvertently took much of the pack with me. Finally we were back on trail and after a couple of bits of paper we were at another circle at a random bridge at the edge of the rice fields. Surely we weren’t going through the rice fields? I gingerly crept around the edge in the hope of not trampling the farmers fields too much. We spread out hunting for paper. Nothing. Until we spotted Turkish suddenly sprint off. 2-3 minutes later he started calling! You might get away with that in the jungle, but seriously – you are in the middle of a rice field, we can all see for a good km in all directions!!!

We were scattered, I carried on along my parallel burn waiting to find out which way we would break. Another circle, and I was surely 100m to the left and could see no trail. My guess would be to the right, and Sloppy was on it. Finally a reluctant call, not at all confident. I headed across the rice field, trying not to cause any damage. I was well towards the back of the pack, but there was paper headed around to the right, one strip, while the rest of the pack were still scattered all across the rice field. I called “RU?” more than once. Mostly met with silence, otherwise unconfident “ON”. I was with Piggy, and later Frozen Dick. We had a good view across the field, and nobody was moving confidently, nobody was calling. Apparently they were chased away by an angry farmer, but nothing was making sense. I couldn’t figure out why they were in the ricefields without paper, and continued trying to solve the previous check. Finally I found some paper – it looked like the hedge had been cut back so maybe the trail had been cut back with it. Finally I found a couple of bits of paper remaining, so I was confident I was back on trail.

But then again, nothing. I knew there was a decent trail running along the bottom of the hill, and figured there would be trail somewhere there. After 3 checks and 34 minutes I phoned Belly (I normally don’t carry a phone, but this time I had the phone even though the GPS wasn’t working). He hinted that I should head to the white water tower. Holy fook. In the distance I could see a water tower across the field a km or so away. I went back to meet up with Piggy and Frozen. Frozen told me there was another water tower just behind us, and the hare probably meant that one. Did I really want to run across a rice field on my own on the off chance there was paper there? I decided to head along the perfectly good running trail (passing another water tower) and then there was another bit of paper!!!! Fresh, clean, recently stapled…. But all on its own. WTF? What the hell was going on with this run?

FUCKING TURKISH DELIGHT!!!! Who in their right mind uses paper as marking when scouting a trail?!?! I found out later I was running around in circles on TD’s scouting paper. I was convinced the rest of the pack had fucked up, and I was trying to solve the hare’s puzzle, only to find out later I was duped by the Turk. I finally got back on trail at a kicked out circle. Headed towards the hills I bumped into HRA, but again we promptly ran out of paper. I hadn’t seen much paper at all, despite putting the effort in. I had a feeling we would head for the cut through, but when we did find trail it was heading straight up a shiggy rocky mountain. I followed for 200m or so, but it was headed straight up, and not cutting over to the nice cut through the mountains. I had no idea how far behind I was, or what else BD had in store for us. It was 45 minutes into the run, and I had hardly seen any paper. My options were to try and follow trail, fearing being stranded again on a pitch black mountain… 2) Head for the cut through and find my own way back along the lake, or 3) turn around and head for home. I chose to turn back – the beer was v. cold by now!

We all got back in time for one of the longest circles I can remember!

3rd July – CH3 – Frozen Dick

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Frozen teamed up with Turkish for a run back at the ball breaker runsite. It had been a good ball breaker, so I had high hopes Frozen would piece together a decent trail presumably using connects that he’d found but not used during the ball breaker. A little late we set off and almost as soon as we found paper, we lost it again. More missing paper? A missing check? A good 100m or so further on I found paper and we were off properly. Down a bit of a hill and a circle. Left would probably intercept the trail we’d just got off, but right was downhill, so I opted for left. Spotted a spiders web, and ducked under it as I checked slowly up the hill. When Sheep Shagger called on from down the hill I forgot about the spiders web, and ran straight into it. Damnit!

It was about then that the heavens opened. Cats and Dogs! Fook Me did it rain. I think we were following HRA, but calls were drowned out by the storm. I got ahead for a bit, and hit a V check. I figured we would go around the lake, so picked right. I ran past 100 and paper was good all the way down the hill into the distance. Nice! I ran on, until there was no more paper. 240m! 240 FFFing m! WTF? I finally saw evidence of what might have once been a rain drenched check back and had to make my way back up the hill. 240m??? WHY? With a small pack, the FRBs need some motivation – 100m is about right to slow them down, but 240m put me DFL, behind Belly Dancer and Tiptoe. An extra half km on my track for what? I cursed that evil Turk for most of the rest of the run, until I later found out that Frozen had done it. I wasn’t really in the mood to contribute at the front after that but slowly clawed my way back into it and eventually found Sheep Shagger completely befuddled at a check.

We seemed to be back on the last leg of the ball breaker, which helped me get a couple right, but then a circle and Sheep shagger kindof calling to the left. “kind of” – not enough to make me tear down paper and mark the trail. When I got to him, he was stood staring at a single strip of paper, around 50m from the check. He’d spent 5 minutes hunting around for anything else. Screwed up hares fucked it up. I got out to the road about when HRA was calling. I chased him down and this was definitely the BB trail. How good was my memory? Sheep Shagger surely had an advantage as he’d hared the BB, I was relying on what I could remember, and assuming it would follow the same route.

Great trails, had they not been so wet. On the one hand the rain cooled us off, on the other it made the mud unpredictably slippery. Along an overgrown trail that had looked so much clearer so many months before, and SS was braver than me. Again I caught him as he was stood transfixed at a circle. Shouldn’t he be checking? Doesn’t he remember where to go? Apparently not, as it looks different now. I remembered the drop off to the right, and picked up paper again. Now we had a small group clear from the pack, and my memory kicking in. I nailed a few checks, especially the check that had cost me so dear back in January – you weren’t catching me again on that one!

Up hill a bit, and then back down, edging to the left. Finally I got one wrong, but it seems the rest were following and also got it wrong. I hacked my way over to the other option and sure enough picked up paper. ON ON down to the dam, and we were nearly home. Straight on for sure, and yes paper again. Another circle at the end, and it had to be the check that Greasy got right in January. I cut down, up and around and got to another circle after 100m. Trail coming from the right meant there had to be an extra loop. Should I go back? Nah, F*ck this sh*t, I was around the corner to the ONIN and shortly back to the beer.

Nice set! I reset part of my BB trail earlier in the year, but I waited 3 years before I did! Today was very familiar!

26th June – CH3 – BMY

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I don’t like to write up my own runs, but not sure anyone else will… The secret mystery co-hare was Belly Dancer, so we had to add a bit of BD magic into the Byte run… A reasonable turnout, but a few FRBs out of town meant everyone would have to do some work. I’m waiting for Sheep Shagger to upload his strava route, but in the meantime, a hare’s view of the run. Hare brief done I set them off, and had time to hear ABB calling ON at the first check, before stuffing a cooler with beer and ice, and lugging it off to the 1st beerstop. The pack was fast, and we were still hauling it up the hill when Sheep Shagger had done the first couple of clicks and was chasing us up the hill!

He didn’t want a beer, but pressed on, guessing the right way. Turkish was next there, grumbling about SS not calling at a previous check. Turkish promptly went left (wrong) and wasn’t seen again. Apparently he did go up the hill, but when he came back down again, he did his own thing. We outfoxed the Turk! It was quite a nasty hill, up and worse coming down – that was Belly’s contribution! 😉 Only a couple of checks on it, but they would have beaten me for sure. After coming back down the hill, the trail turned left and headed straight back to the beer stop – why not? Time for another beer!

I was off resetting bits of the trail when the pack came through for their 2nd drink, but I’m sure Belly gave them a nice welcome, along with Sups who’d decided to stick around and help with drinking the beer. NOYB led HRA back down the hill out on the 3rd leg. This seemed to take a long, long time. Perhaps the checks were tricky? I know if I was running, I would be confused, as after another loop we brought the pack back to the beer stop. Time for a 3rd beer! A hash record? 3 beer stops… all in the same place… The cloverleaf run.

I heard there was a check that really caught them out (I shall have to use that one again!), and ultimately it was TipToe that solved it, and the pack was close together led into the 3rd beer by ABB. ABB had commented about the efficiency of having 2 beer stops in the same place after he passed it the 2nd time – I had to stop myself from responding! If you liked 2, you’ll love the 3rd! From there it was straight back to the A site for a circle cut short by the rains. Sloppy deserves a mention as he set off very late, was given the option of missing Belly’s hill, but chose to do it all and managed to catch up coming in with the front of the pack. 3 beer stops on a run, all in the same place – the clover leaf badge awarded!


22nd June – CH4 – Cumalot

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Courtesy Alice:-

Cumalot and Boy Wonder Omsin wove a masterful trail of treachery and deceit in the hills and vales around the Canal Rd footy field.
I was feeling pumped and ready to really push myself, HIIT sessions in the bank and guilt from last night’s Yummy pizza extravaganza.
We were on small white strips, marked A1. Paper generally faced runners, circle checks were in clear sight and perfectly situated, it was time to challenge ChackWao and the rest!
At an early check I took the unlikely option away from the hills and ChackWao mentioned as such, although he added it has been used before. After 100m, a cleverly positioned strip revealed itself and I was on! The next few km were a carbon copy, as I nailed perhaps 5 out of 8 and managed to get a few hundred metres ahead of the pack. Making the most of my fortune, I pushed hard and managed to chose correctly second time around on the checks I got wrong.
We went up into the forest, three choices and I took the middle up. Right again and into deeper, more dense bush. I couldn’t hear the pack now. Trail went down into a dry stream bed then up a thick spur on narrow ill defined animal paths. Parts were runnable and parts that weren’t I bashed on as fast as I could.
A beastly check at a saddle after 30 mins had me take the brave option and head higher and steeper. I heard Chack yell OnOn and descended at a lick. To my surprise, he was still making his way up to the check so I chose one of the two main options and again that lovely little white strip with A1 popped out after a scampered 100m through the woods.
Here the trail became very narrow and often just bush bashed. Paper was harder to see and the hillside was dodgy with Poo sticks and rocks underfoot. I slid a few times but stayed upright. Apparently HRA crashed a couple of times and his posterior needed TLC tonight.
I was still ahead but it was hard work facing checks alone and just trying not to get caught. I crashed into a barb wire fence that was papered but only for us to run along. Chacky was closing and we came down off the hills towards some roofs below.
At the next junction he overtook me probably 600m from home! flew down the wide path then slowed and yelled Looking! I seized my chance and ducked right into a clearing. There was paper, a weir and thick, tall grass to wade through. I was passed yet again after a minute and the lanky Antipodean had glory flaring in his nostrils. Paper clearly marked trail ahead all the way to the road. There was one last chance the hares had some final magic up their sleeves with a False Trail where Chacky was headed….I turned left hoping against hope to find hidden paper and hear a forlorn False Trail call. My hopes were dashed as On In rent the air – I’d never catch the larrikin now.
Taking a chance I beetled down my path through the trees, parallel to the road, and Chacky’s calls. A sharp right and I was also out on the road but 30m back alas, and thus followed the seasoned Sandgroper over the finish line just shy of 45 mins I think.
A superb set with lowland trail, fields, forest, hills and a dry creek bed, oh and some barb wire. The hares were astute in their route and variety of twists and turns; I felt very pleased I’d risen to challenge them. Kudos to ChackWao for hunting me down. HRA, Sex Pistol, Sheep Shagger and Blows Herself steamed home in short order, ABB, Does Nothing, TipToe and finally long time returnee Baldrick stumbled in on a twisted ankle and a tale of lost trail.
Circle was light and fun, especially Shagless splashing DGI for knicker malfunction at Butter is Better, then the revenge splash had a Police citation complete with colour picture and 500 THB fine for carrying his helmet while driving his motorbike. Touche!

19th June – CH3 – ABB & Cuckold

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So Cuckold was the mystery co-hare! Remembering his history at Maejo, I was tempted to turn around and run, but had faith that ABB would keep him under control… We set off and the paper was a bit on the environmentally friendly side – not always straightforward to spot the next bit, and promptly running out at a junction. I peeled off to the right and finally the young eyes of None of Your Business spotted a circle check hidden behind leaves on the back of a tree (so I’m told, I didn’t see it!) I nearly gave up checking to the right, and when I turned back there was a flash of whitish paper on the back of a tree… I was ON!

There is a fork in the road, and no obvious paper, so I carried on the main road to the right. 50m or so later I spotted paper up the hill to the left on the other bit of the fork. I found a way to climb up and called as CW and the pack were catching up. We looped up the hill a bit, before descending through a little village – no checks, just a few dogs and kids to throw rocks at. A circle check gave some options. It was possible that it was a back check, but I thought we’d gone too far through the little village (whenever ABB is hare, I’m looking out for backchecks!). It couldn’t be right, so I turned left. Nada, which left the straight option, which would have been straight off the cliff, headed towards the saddle. I headed in that direction, and sure enough paper – good luck to whoever had to lay paper straight off the cliff from that check!

I had told myself to take it steady today, as I want to do a longer run tomorrow, so I idled my way over the saddle. Paper was in places good, but then in others there could be 20m+ between strips. I got to a bit where I couldn’t find any paper, so eventually assumed there was a check hidden away somewhere. NOYB showed up and I headed down to the little dried up dyke and mud road. NOYB found paper just as I found a circle, and he lead a few other runners down the hill towards me. Turned right on the road, and after 100m or so spotted paper on the trail the other side of the dyke. Found a place to hop over, and carried on with Sheep Shagger kicking the circle out behind me.

Another junction, and paper leading straight on past it – Sorry ABB, I’m not falling for that! Sure enough I could call On as CW got to the corner behind me. Again – paper to the right, no chance! I think I nailed 3-4 back checks in a row, and perhaps that split the pack as CW and I didn’t hear anyone else again. Trail was tough to figure out in places, and one stretch through the nursery it had clearly been taken down – fortunately we had a good idea where we were headed and picked up trail leaving the main entrance. Again trail tough to follow through shiggy, but it had to be headed towards the mainer trail by the other shelter. Having seen paper on the drive in, we had to be headed towards it, so a 50/50 circle. I was wrong, CW was right, but I caught him up at another back check.

We crossed over the road into the main Tiger’s Head forest, and I was sure we’d be headed parallel with the road back, as surely this was already going to be a long run. A circle here took some solving with CW and I checking several options each. Finally he called it and I headed towards his call, not entirely sure where the check was now. I rejoined trail and caught him up at another check. Damn we were headed deep into the forest – this was going to be a long, long run! That next check screwed me up, as it wasn’t a back check, but I went up 2 possible trails that were wrong trying to make my way towards CW’s call. One of them had yellow paper neatly marking the way, but sadly it was old paper.

The trail was leading inevitably towards the hill – you had a choice hares, you could have gone around it! I was on my own, CW somewhere ahead, the pack should have been behind. Keep going, keep going. On the ridge, I jogged along, and finally found CW coming back from checking the wrong way. WTF? It had to be left! Surely? We were at the 5 trail junction, and the obvious way back was down into the gully and out… It wasn’t and again, very good job to the hares – several times, even late into a run you outfoxed me with checks. CW called it, and I trailed him back home. As I ran in, I was expecting to tell the hares that they might have to wait a long time for the rest of the pack to get there – instead, I found most of the pack sat down tucking into a beer! WTF? Everyone else had given up and short cut back?!? Shame on you!!! The 2nd half of the run was marked much more clearly, and the whole thing was a great set – a very tough 8.8km – I guess I don’t need to do a long run tomorrow!

Lonely Fly By

12th June – CH3 – Alice

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On Alice, by Alice…

The A site was swiftly changed when a dead dog was found in the abandoned building. Frozen wondered whether the 2m cobra was responsible….and all in all a move across the valley seemed sensible.
Turkey sidled up eyes gleaming, “I saw your paper!” he confided in the manner of a naughty schoolboy. So the Turk had arrived early to recce. Humph. More evidence for the case against the accused.
The pack were running on white paper dipped in blue octopus blood aka Sheep Shagger’s old printer ink. Alice had held up a strip of Blow’s Herself’s yellow just to wind things up a tad!
And they’re off! Into the overgrown path around the little lake they went, apart from the Turk who scampered up the in trail, found paper the wrong way and yelled On On as he disappeared into the wild, green yonder in reverse.
Luckily Frozen Dick espied a potential path from the tricky circle in the gulley with various spur and streambed options. HRA went past and found true trail loud and clear. Turkey’s fading calls from the wrong direction had confused matters and alarmed the hares. Thankfully no one followed the heir of Anatolia.
Up the side of the hill went the pack with a circle on top. A late arrived ChackWao and Turkey ascended from another path but soon located trail and walkers. Left was on on and then down, down, down a narrow hillside path to the lakes property.
Here things got interesting. HRA and Lars found paper up the hill and followed around the forest edge. The false trail stopped them in their dainty tracks and wiped out any advantage. Turkey looked down in the river bed ravine and spied paper, allegedly. Here the story gets confused with Turkey claiming complete success on all further checks, Vs and FTs to arrive home first in 46 mins. Chack and the rest swore blind they never saw a glimpse of TD from then on and the weight of evidence is probably in favour of the majority. The Turk did describe the V check on the saddle – mountain pass in Superman’s lingo – but how he got there remains known only to the Turk and his maker.
The rest of the pack descended into a long sandy creek bed emerging in the centre of the property. A circle went right and around the edge of the forest on a well runable path. Suddenly a turn into the forest back from a FT soon after another circle. Along a wet streambed the pack stumbled, sandy, rocky and quite scenic. From here Chack Wao escaped when the trail became a clear path, rocky and uneven in places, up it climbed, turning and twisting towards a main left right trail. Paper went left to a circle 40m away. There was straight on the main path, left back into the forest or right up a steep gully in the facing hillside. Chack tried all three, assisted by Shrek before ABB simply emerged, turned right and found paper 50m from the junction. From then on it was all downhill. ABB’s internal gyroscope was functioning well and after Chack’s arrival a few minutes after TD, ABB swiftly followed by HRA hove into view. Kwaz appeared from 180 degrees the other direction like a sprite borne on a scented zephyr, and admitted knee pain made him turn left once over the hill and trudge back along the road. Sheep Shagger came home loaded with rocks again and Shrek grimaced as he told of lessons learnt that checks aren’t always 180 infront. Does Nothing strode in then the famous jungle call announced Frozen and his buddy Tiptoe and soon we were settling down to social drinking, the usual bickering, a good natured circle and the hash song closed events at site. OnOnOn was at Grill of India, everyone enjoyed except the GM.

5th June – CH3 – Sheep Shagger

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Rating: 7.5/10 (2 votes cast)

(Courtesy Alice)

Sheep Shagger was flying solo in the hills behind the Samoeng Rd footy pitch and he not only took off without assistance and flew scenically around but landed safely although not on the right runway!

The A site was a very decent shelter away from our usual haunt so that added something to the run. Luckily the weather was fab so we didn’t need the cover at all. Good to see Softballs back and the average age was much reduced by Spitz Spunk and Just Jeff.

We were running on playing card sized white squares and Sheep Shagger said he’d taken any other paper down he’d seen. Oh how we regretted that blatant fib! Back checks were 3 pieces stapled together and Falsies were No Sheep signs. All well and good. On on.

Off we went heading up a familiar hill. An early check had me in a field to the right with paper hanging under a tree. Long yellow paper and long white strips. No probs, old shit. Chacky and the Turk were blazing trails, Spitz was in the van and the checks had us bunched. The Kwaz was motoring and Frozen was striding out at back of pack.

A bit higher up the hill, we dropped a few stitches. A check had us struggling and we were heading steeply up as On On was called. Paper was sparse but looked fresh. The issue was that it was KnockOut paper, the same length but half a cm narrower.
Paper disappeared but we spread out to solve the mystery….in vain.. and bashed on up the steep winding path where KO had the beer stop. The pack weren’t happy at this point and a tad confused. What was the hare up too?

CW and TD scouted further and found current paper leading up from another route from the right to join our path. Result! We were on again. Running round below the curved summit of a hill we came to a V which threw us all. Right went on then totally stopped. Left went on…then a bar was spotted. We piled back down the right track, there was a very long gap without paper, and a spur down and right was suddenly clearly marked….then again nothing. It just stopped. I went down and further. Others retraced and found a circle I think in the forested summit. It was all a bit hit and miss at this point. The pack were doing good impressions of heads up their arses chickens.

Alice carried on around under the summit to join up with the guys shouting Circle Check from above. On on was called going right and here we had the best part of the run. High trails, trees, views, and good checks. At one Turkish arrived first and ordered Chacky down the less attractive left option. TD went right and Alice saw him about 100m away, silently checking and refusing to respond the “Turkey, Are you?” Chacky was on and we flew down the path to catch him at the next circle. Turkish arrived after Alice and Jeff and the Son of Anatolia neglected happily to break the circle. The guy does play a different game to the rest of us.

A Falsie slowed the loping Aussie as he hadn’t listened at harebrief. Three small squares does not a very clear check back bar make. Down we cantered around the hill on lovely trails to a huge R and arrow pointing left up a trail. Sheep Shagger here was definitely trying to be clever, or too clever. It worked! Again 3 or 4 clear papers then nothing. Or nothing we could see. Frustration. Tiredness. The R was so clearly marked. Push on.

The FRBs explored further and a few hundred metres on around found a False Trail sign and out trail paper, which we followed back in, harrumphing and discussing WTF.

Only Spitz and Father Abraham himself ABB, actually found a check back bar 20m past the R sign and returned to the 4 way and went right on the true R trail. We spied them coming back on an impressive looking path half way up the huge quarry wall. Does Nothing, Kwaz and Softballs came in on true walkers’ trail and it was time for a well earned circle of fun. Federbrau proved too tempting for Alice as well as Kwazi’s Decathlon throne when the NY native was on ice.

Fine trails and good scouting from the Shagger of Sheep. Sod’s law we found very similar but recent paper. Suggest check main routes off circles for 120m and rip down anything. Or mark your paper. Checkback bars needed to be longer and clearer, the shitty ink on Falsies was no problem apart from having to stop to make out the funny image. A fun run, excellent use of terrain and trails and a friendly OnOnOn in Fajitas Tex Mex.

29th May – CH3 – HRA

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(By Alice)

Forest Dump
HRA set a twisty, swirly, forest run from the new shelter behind the BaanSuanHimDoi restaurant writes Alice. It was wet when he set but luckily the rains held off for run and circle. Pack was small with one visitor, Forest Dump, a Septic from Seoul H3 originally.

Eye of the Tiger
Pre run Sheep Shagger demonstrated great skill with HRA’s blunt chopper and ploughed a few square metres of red mud while hacking the base of errant shrubbery. Turkish, with his Tiger Woods driving ability, played golf under the trees with a stick and told anyone who’d listen he’d paid 9K baht for a set of clubs, which he’d never played with.

Norwegian Wood
From the off we crossed the road into the woods and 200m later we were already buggered. The paper just stopped. No check, False Trail, just nothing. Shrek, Chack etc scampered further and further to no avail. Amusingly Frozen appears 2 minutes later from behind the milling pack, shouting OnOn as though he’d found trail.

Hallo Hallo Good to be Back
Eventually HRA was summoned and we were sent west past the farmhouse to locate paper and recommence. Back to the road and then a check, somewhere. ChackWao shouted checking and headed further along the road, other spread but quietly. I crossed the road and found a gulley heading deep into the forest behind the Snake Head Buddha Temple. No bugger was guarding the check or replied where it was, so 100m was difficult to judge. I heard an OnOn call and saw colour moving right. Guessing they’d gone up to the temple or similar I climbed up and thru to find no one and hear silence!

Take the Long Way Home
Back at the road I meet HRA and newly arrived Sloppy Rod. We get redirected to the check and trail. Damp forest, gulleys, sharp switchbacks and spurs, up, down and up. Bits of paper were missing in short sections here too and there wasn’t always enough at checks to leave clear trail to join the check to trail. It doesn’t help that some rip short strips into stamp sized morsels and scatter among stones, many of which are white.

Runaway Boy
Sloppy was running like a machine and disappeared with alacrity. I catch Frozen, describe the issue at the check – which he later describes as complaining! As if. Up through the wet, green trail, well marked until a steep but soft jungle bash down to an unkicked out check. Every bugger had run through and all the paper was still hanging by the circle. Shabby hash behaviour.
Sheep Shagger was carrying a rock the size of his head and dreaming of a road to dump it by. The road and HRA marking a W/R split came soon enough.

Wishing and Hoping
I headed across into the forest and reasoned that if trail was headed back to the A it must turn left at some point. In forest silence and alone, I clamber up a hillside hoping to find trail and paper. At the top….nothing…so I bash on up the spur to the adjoining ridge. Bingo! A check and paper hanging. Which with this pack of bastards could mean they’d already run through.
I check east down a pretty thick wooded slope for 120m, nothing. Shiite. Back up and along an adjoining spur heading south east….yeeeeeeesss. OnOn!

The Dangling Conversation
At this point I hear Chacky 80m behind and the pack of FRBs. Another check. Mmm. Left looks clearer and easier, so I go right, I know what a devious knave HRA can be. Checking right! I yell three times as someone starts to yell Circle Check. After ten seconds or so Sloppy appears on my trail 50 m behind.

Checking right I shout again.
Are you on?
Checking right!
Are you on?
Does checking right sound like on on?
Then why would I break the circle and lay paper?
How does checking right sound like on on?
Because you mumble. If you took your cock out of your mouth maybe I’d hear you clearly.
Yes, it’s that time of year again folks!

The End
Sloppy took left trail and found paper with an On On that sounded nothing like Checking right. I cut down a steep path and jumped a deep stream gulley to follow the streaking American out of the valley and up a bank to the A. ChackWao gambolled in next and the pack returned in good order. Jeff and SS with his rock plus Does Nothing were already home and Superman in a clean 18 years old hash t shirt and smart work slacks had arrived by car.
It was circle,bike and curry with the guys in town. Kudos HRA, another lovely set in one of your pet areas.